Another day at the Farm from texasfarmcouple's blog

We've been a poly family for a decade or so - three of us.  During the last 3 or four years we have been looking off and on.

We realized from the start that we have several things that limit our potential match pool.  First of all, is the 'rural' issue - we are 35 miles from a city.  We own our farmstead, so our 'match' needs to be willing to relocate.  Additionally, we are in Texas, have kids, and dogs.  We don't have huge disposable incomes and are the opposite of 'glamourous'.  We are much more 'prepper' and 'off-grid'.  Also, we are not into the party/drug/booze/swinging lifestyles.  The one bright spot in our searching is that we are not set on a specific 'look' or age.  

So, our potential match pool is pretty small no matter how you look at it.

Over the years we have learned that the vast majority of single women profiles are garbage.  First off, there is a significant number that are outright fake - for whatever reason.  These folks could be easily eliminated by the sites by ID verification, IP tracking, and text/phone verification.  That would effectively eliminate duplicates and stop the majority of scammers, once identified, from starting over.  But, that would reduce the number of 'members' which in turn is believed to reduce the incentive for couples to pay....  So no dating sites have really cracked down on it.  In fact most of the software packages have 'fakes' bundled.  Of the ones that are 'real', many are shopping for the best deal they can get and move from family to family.  Others want to be 'pillow princesses'.  And then there are some that are outright psycho or even mentally disabled that have seen the 'sisterwives' shows and feel that that is what they want.  Some are even looking to actively attempt to destabilize existing poly families for personal gratification or the 'get even' for previous failed relationships (hell raisers).

About the term 'pillow princess' - both of the wives use this term to describe the women that feel that they can 'join' without bringing (or doing) anything other than playing in the bedroom.  They expect to be taken care of - room, board, etc - yet contribute nothing to the family.  If they work outside, they typically keep everything they earn and spend it on themselves (car, clothes, etc.)

We have run into every one of these many times.  Yet, we still keep looking.