Try on for size ? from loveandgratitude's blog

I wonder how many single women begin talking to families to ultimately only find out that the couple isn’t ready and now knows it.
I don’t like being anyone’s experiment.
I am not practice.
I wish I could count how many times in the last two years I’ve been told, “you’re an amazing beautiful woman and you deserve a couple who can commit to you.”
How about this one: “We have realized we aren’t ready for this lifestyle now. But we wish you the best and we’d like to stay friends.”
Oh gosh I have so many examples by now. I open up and become vulnerable only to find out a month in, that they don’t want a third.”
People...Families...Please please make sure you know what you want. Or give it a chance before suddenly dropping it with some epiphany that you don’t want another woman in the relationship.
My favorite *sarcasm* is when people admit their own insecurities and never think of mine.
“We are too busy to pursue this kind of relationship.”
Oh gosh I could go on and on.
I Still allow myself to stay open and vulnerable. It’s difficult. I am exhausted by the same story almost every time (outside of a very painful breakup with a more long term relationship).
Some of my friends and family wonder why I would keep looking. I know 100% what I want and seek. I wish everyone did. My feelings get hurt most when I feel like a trial run.
People
Be
Honest
With
Yourselves

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vegemite
Oct 29 '19
Excellent title "Try On For Size?" - and I can feel the pain of being discarded by a family. How about we adopt this motto - "a wife is for life, not just Christmas". These are marriages we are talking about, people's lives, and sometimes children. The idea of a trial relationship will be most likely fatal to any long-term prospects. Easy in, easy out. The formality of a state-sanctioned marriage at least gives some people a pause for reflection before terminating. In the absence of that sanction, people should hold themselves to an even higher standard of behaviour.Excellent title "Try On For Size?" - and I can feel the pain of being discarded by a family. How about we adopt this motto - "a wife is for life, not just Christmas". These are mar...See more
loveandgratitude
Oct 29 '19
A wife is for life, not just Christmas. You are spot on. That is my new motto now, too. Thanks for the sincerity.
Kimmiew35
Dec 12 '19
My family discarded me at the age of 19 but little did they know I gained MORE LOVE and got to feel REAL LOVE from others unlike what they showed to me.
theoneo
Jan 21
I'm the same, but for some reason we consider it socially acceptable to reject (or even ghost) without explanation, while never looking within ourselves as to what it is we really want. This a hangover from the monogamous "prince" and "princess" that somehow "fit", and also the idea that "if they're not for you there'll be someone for them" so you shouldn't need to be considerate before starting. Form experience it's harder to do this as a "couple" unless that couple was built with a clear idea of what they want *as a polygamous family*. The complete and holistic picture needs to be there from the beginning, not shoe-horned in after your first wife has settled.I'm the same, but for some reason we consider it socially acceptable to reject (or even ghost) without explanation, while never looking within ourselves as to what it is we really want. This a hangove...See more
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By loveandgratitude
Added Oct 27 '19

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