These are hints people...pay attention from Familyfocused's blog

There are fakes that the admins kick fairly quickly but then there are those that fly under the radar for a day or two.

You should start watching the signs so you don't get played or just plain disappointed. 


* Messaged you out of nowhere but never looked at your profile

* Has just created the ad today but has several new "friends" all within just a few minutes 

* Profile details don't remotely match photo. My favorite was the pale blond blue eyed native American from Nigeria 

-feel free to add other obvious signs


Stop being suckered.

If you stop being an easy mark to these leeches then maybe it will cease to be such a target. At very minimum,  you will not feel like a prize dumba** for getting played. 


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Familyfocused
Oct 12
*cough cough @Chris .
Familyfocused
Oct 12
Its funny...one of my lady friends on here...not someone I/we are courting, I asked her to critique my profile from the single woman point of view. It boiled down to geez man it is So long. I suppose she is right so I whittled it down to less than half. I just figure that a decent match will have a decent attention span and women I talk to for a week who don't know any of the basic details I am up front about are likely not a match.Its funny...one of my lady friends on here...not someone I/we are courting, I asked her to critique my profile from the single woman point of view. It boiled down to geez man it is So long. I suppose ...See more
Familyfocused
Oct 12
In re sailing by on looks...can't recommend it. Sounds shallow temporary and honestly a little boring. Yeah I like pretty girls as much as any guy but pretty sure won't make for a happy marriage
Familyfocused
Oct 18
Hand waggle...I am one of those with respect to no pic of her. Plural marriage is still seen as a niche sort of relationship and there are creepers and weirdos who have previously shown up in this sort of space to try harassing irl pligs and wannabe pligs. So if anyone should catch flack then I prefer it be me rather than her. This is why I make a sharp point in my profile of saying that confirmation of who one is ie not using pics off the internet etc will be needed once the mutual interest has been established. Just getting on a video call sort of thing. Besides, in our case I am the ugly one. If a woman can come to find my mug palettable then she has nothing to worry about with my wife. The general point about lots of the couples on here acting weird is pretty accurate from what I have seen and heard from women on here. Part of why I make the blog posts about caution. I mainly see the accounts of single women but the post is doing what I had hopped and attracting other points of view as well. If only there were still a discussion forum on the site. Then lots more of us with good will and honest motives might be able to support each others searches and get conversations going that get us noticed.Hand waggle...I am one of those with respect to no pic of her. Plural marriage is still seen as a niche sort of relationship and there are creepers and weirdos who have previously shown up in this sor...See more
Familyfocused
Oct 18
The point about her not being on board...I should have addressed that comment because that is Huge here. There are guys who have some sort of...fantasy? LARP? I don't know what to call it but who will either not be married at all or who have not discussed the idea with their wives much less have her on board. I have heard about that crap regularly. Occasionally guys pretending to be single women as well. Definitely confirm that the wife not only exists but is on board...making sure you get the opportunity to talk to her as just the two of you. There are loads of stories of women getting interested in tje couple and the wife sabotaging the relationship because she really doesn't want plural marriage. So talk to her without him and get a real vibe check going. Even if she is fine with it and y'all don't click, things will be rocky.The point about her not being on board...I should have addressed that comment because that is Huge here. There are guys who have some sort of...fantasy? LARP? I don't know what to call it but who will...See more
Polywifen
Oct 18
Hey Ladylooking!! Tbh I am more concerned when there is a picture of the wife only and not the husband, I mean.....why? If the woman is seeking either an additional wife or husband for herself that is fine, but I have no idea why they think I want to see a picture of my potential SW and not my potential husband. As for being or not being on board, well, tbf all someone needs is a picture, there is a possibility he can post it regardless so that's no guarantee. If I talk to a husband I usually ask very early on about his wife and eventually expect to talk to her before I get invested anyway. There is no way of anyone getting further than wasting a bit of my time, I am honestly confounded why anyone thinks they can get away with it.Hey Ladylooking!! Tbh I am more concerned when there is a picture of the wife only and not the husband, I mean.....why? If the woman is seeking either an additional wife or husband for herself that is...See more
Familyfocused
Oct 18
It is amazing just how far some will take their...game? Not sure what is in their mind. I won't get invested till we meet in person. I would be a bit discouraged save for the fact that I have lived plural marriage. When things were good they were very good. Very good for all of us and potential for a big happy familyIt is amazing just how far some will take their...game? Not sure what is in their mind. I won't get invested till we meet in person. I would be a bit discouraged save for the fact that I have lived pl...See more
Polywifen
Oct 19
I'm the same Paterfamilias, I have also experienced a Poly family and loved it when it was good. There were some FWP though and this is why I am ever so cautious when it comes to dealing with the wives, especially when it seems they are the ones in control of the search. I KNOW a plural family can be amazing, but it's only going to be as functional as the people in it.I'm the same Paterfamilias, I have also experienced a Poly family and loved it when it was good. There were some FWP though and this is why I am ever so cautious when it comes to dealing with the wive...See more
Polywifen
Oct 19
I remember many years ago talking to a man who was in the scene quite some time, you could talk to him for ages and then at some point, he would end the conversation by going 'I like you, now talk to my wife' leaving his wife's profile in the link....Whaaaa? He did that to me twice it was so weird. I talked to other single women I know and he did the same thing to everyone he spoke to...'I like you, now talk to my wife!'I remember many years ago talking to a man who was in the scene quite some time, you could talk to him for ages and then at some point, he would end the conversation by going 'I like you, now talk to ...See more
Familyfocused
Oct 20
Poor segue. Anytime a woman is showing enough interest in us as a family...I break that out as it is a family equation and not going to work if they are just into me...I make a point of having my wife read all the messages back and forth. I tell women that I share everything at the beginning of the conversation naturally. Full disclosure. No secrets. Anyway, if she is into us I will ask them to talk and see if they hit it off. If things get so it is clear we are all interested then a video call or phone call and non fakable pics etc. I was made out to be a prize dumbass recently by failing to do that step. That step is soon important even if everything seems so natural and is going well. Trust but verify is important as can be. Ideally though if the opportunity presents itself, I try to encourage as much contact between my wife and someone we are getting to know. Only hopefully a tad smoother than the guy you describe.Poor segue. Anytime a woman is showing enough interest in us as a family...I break that out as it is a family equation and not going to work if they are just into me...I make a point of having my wife...See more
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