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I am looking for a single non religious man whose never been married or has kids and I keep running into the same problem here and in real life,the guys that stay there single on their page on here after talking finally say they are taken or have kids.
After meeting some of these couples I came to the realization polygamy is not for me anymore,so I changed my focus.
There are also hardly any guys close to my age on this site,the only guys that come my way are ones old enough to be my grand-dad or in other countries which is a no go for me.
What can I do to better my chances of finding a quality partner ?
Thank you for listening to my mini rant!!!
When I am feeling down, I just look at some beautiful vintage pictures, like this
Just look at Elizabeth Taylor's lovely, brown soulful eyes.
What's this you say? Elizabeth Taylor infamously had violet blue eyes that were her trademark? But....as you see in this picture, her eyes are very unviolet! Surely there is no such natural phenomenon that would make a woman with light eyes, appear dark in a photograph?
Recently I was greatly amused that someone accused a woman of being a fakety, fake, fake fake because she had the temerity of looking very different in many of her pictures. I had to laugh as I could see that it was the same woman, it's just the magic of womanhood (by magic read, tanning, hair extensions, lip fillers and yes, lighting.) Now I don't know if he had recently come across a real fake asking him for $200 because her gas/phone/electricity/car/medical bill needs paying and was projecting it onto the makeup magician but my pointing his error out got me chucked off of his Xmas card list.
This search is hard, SO hard and so frustrating. We wonder why this person who we contact doesn't bother answering back, or they do and they say no thank you. We wonder if we are not attractive enough for them, too short, too fat, too thin, too poor, too old. In my case, I am inevitably some of those things plus too liberal,too opinionated, too Jewish and most likely, too bloody far away!
So we have all of these insecurities about connecting with someone and then there's ALL the scammers and the weirdos to make the search in these communities just that little bit more intolerable.
No matter how thick you think your skin is, it will sometimes get you down, make you feel that it just isn't worth it and that 'everyone here is a fake' but it is not true, the search is not all that different from monogamy, it's just the proportions are different. There are still plenty of fakes in the monogamous personals, it's just so many of you who are married have very little experience in them. I can tell you as a single person, I've had more "Widowed Engineers who were born in Chicago but write English like a foreign speaker" then there are fakes in the Polygamy personals world.
If I just gave up entirely, I am giving up on the prospect of future marriage entirely, but those already married are just giving up on more of what they already have. Maybe that is why I am not losing any sleep over the fakes, single women cannot give up because of romance scammers, profile stalkers and men cheating on their wives. We have to keep on going in the hopes that at some point, someone will see our value in all our imperfections, our opinions and our differences and we will value them for the same.
Good luck to you all. xx
I'll take you go one of my favorite places and show you WHY I like this spot so much.
I hope to see you soon! Comment and let me know what you think about the Off Grid Homestead in Costa Rica!Would you enjoy being here?
I decided to do a few videos so you can get to know me and find out what I am doing.
Feel free to bookmark my profile, comment and follow along. I'm sure you will enjoy learning about my Costa Rica Off-Grid Homestead
Apparently I write too much when i send a multi paragraph introduction. I have no idea with the huge number of poly ie swinger hedonist types that are here vs woman seeking plural marriage, if it will make any difference. I guess I should limit myself to 3-4 lines and leave it be.
Will have to give that a try and see if it makes a difference.
Would appreciate some feedback from the woman who read through the blogs about what sort of introduction gets their attention. Well, positive attention.
We try to put a lot of effort into chatting and getting to know folks to see if they are a good match.
But, the vast majority are not actually here looking to become a sisterwife. I don't know about the couples, but I am beginning to suspect that a lot of the couples are not either- just swingers searching for the next bit of 'fun'.
The latest scammer was purportedly from Northwest Ohio. She literally started asking for $20 within 2 hours of starting to chat. "living with my parents and they won't feed me".
A video chat showed the reality: she has a wedding ring, a child, and lives in an apartment. Later she started pushing for us to send money for a bus ticket - claimed she had no ID and had to buy it so she could use the eticket - the usual scammer nonsense.
I don't bother to name names - they always change them anyways.
Speaking of which: when they are identified they don't get deleted. And when they come back, they don't get deleted. So, you end up with the same ones again and again.
At least there is now a 'willing to relocate' info on profiles now. Not that folks will be honest about that either, but it does help a bit.
Some of the things that have become glaringly clear to us in the last 3 months about the women looking:
1. Several of them are mentally disabled. They are either low IQ, or have other significant issues and in several cases have 'caregivers' or are in treatment centers.
2. Several are serial seekers. They go from family to family and in many cases are already chatting up several 'next stops' for when they decide to move on. A variety of motivations fuel these ones but I'm betting that deep down they are looking for the fairy tale and or big score.
3. Outright scammers - send me money for a ticket, etc.
4. Bored and lonely. Unhappy at home, lie about living circumstances, usually grossly obese, etc.
5. Academics - these folks are researching the lifestyle and documenting the real folks on here and their responses to 'chats' for use in research papers and/or articles. They are fake and are 'playing the part' to draw out the 'answers' they want.
6. Knights in Armor - looking for low hanging fruit for prosecution "I have a 17 year old daughter with me that is interested in the lifestyle too", or just disrupt a lifestyle that they KNOW is wrong. So far, every one of these I have seen is quickly and decisively deleted by the admins (wonder why they don't do that on the others?).
Most of these can be eliminated by ID verification. Not sure why it hasn't been implemented. But it sure would help.
Constantly vetting the scammers gets depressing. And is a waste of time for paying users.
Hopefully things will change...
You should start watching the signs so you don't get played or just plain disappointed.
* Messaged you out of nowhere but never looked at your profile
* Has just created the ad today but has several new "friends" all within just a few minutes
* Profile details don't remotely match photo. My favorite was the pale blond blue eyed native American from Nigeria
-feel free to add other obvious signs
Stop being suckered.
If you stop being an easy mark to these leeches then maybe it will cease to be such a target. At very minimum, you will not feel like a prize dumba** for getting played.
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