User blogs

I have always felt the kids should come first in any relationship.. I also feel kids should be taught self sufficiency. In todays world, with all of the uncertainty and major issues, kids should be taught to garden, food preservation, how to care for livestock, taught to drive a vehicle with a clutch, how to hunt and fish. Survival techniques also, edible wild plants and medicinal herbs. How to build a shelter, start a fire even in inclement conditions. How to tell north and south in the wilderness. Firearms training and marksmanship. So many of these life skills are being left behind in the technological world we live in. Of course, you have to have a parent(s) who know these skills. 

Teach your children well. 

I've always found these personals sites interesting. I am highly analytical and all of them are pretty much the same. Everyone is pretty much looking for the same things, yet not finding them. I call this the "Gambling Syndrome," you know if you've ever sat in front of a slot machine and won a small amount of money, you end up putting it all back in the machine in hopes of hitting a bigger and better jackpot. I think people do the same thing on these sites. They find people who are completely suitable for them, but they believe they can find someone bigger and better, so they just continue to play. While I do not believe anyone should settle for less than they truly deserve, I believe that a person shouldn't fall into that kind of trap.

I guess I have a lot to say this morning. I was a Special Agent for Air Force OSI, as well as a Journalist, a DJ, and having lived and worked both in the military and in the private sector for major media. IN the USAF I was in investigations and Intel. I am very concerned about the state of things in the world right now. There is a lot of instability, in the financial markets worldwide. China is increasingly unstable financially and geo-politically. Iran and Israel are increasing tensions. I guess the point I am trying to make is, this is the best time to join up with a family if you are a single woman looking to do so. There is strength in numbers and history has shown that families with more hands and helpers are the ones that survive major economic and wartime issues. It is my opinion that the future is looking bleak as we head into these major issues. I believe it is time to prepare for what is looking like a seriously difficult time for all of us. Most people want to put their heads in the sand and avoid the possibility of world conflict. For us leaders of family units, we cannot put our heads in the sand, we have to face the possibilities, even the inevitability of a major world war and the consequences for our families if this happens. If you are a single woman in this world, especially with children, you must also face these issues and prepare for the worst. For you, this is a good time to plan ahead and join a stable couple, build up your family and make preparations for these possible issues. Strong family units are the ones that will fare better in a world full of conflict and instability.

Can we just ponder the irony of someone claiming how important it would be to have good communication to make a relationship work and that SAME person will block you for not a) seeing and b) responding to a message to them after THIRTY MINUTES!!!?  It really does make you wonder how self aware (and lack thereof) some people are who advertise themselves here.  For better or worse, I know myself pretty well,  I can be blunt and very sarcastic, I generally think I balance the line between funny and I am very careful not to offend those who might do something innocent or in jest.  In other words, I try to not let my words hurt UNLESS I want to, which is goes back to my bluntness and inability to ignore when I think something is wrong.  

But that's a long story and trying to learn to ignore better is a process I am working on. ;o)

Regardless,  as I said, I know myself, know my limits, know my wants and what I can and cannot handle.  I wonder how many people have really pondered how they really behave, how they are in and out of relationships, how they argue and indeed, how they communicate.

Or do they, as so many people who sign up in these groups do, feel that 'everything will work out fine with the RIGHT person'  thereby leaving the onus on the other person to fill in those relationship skills gap that these people invariably have.

I'm back on the line after a while hoping to find a woman (women) that I can have a real connection with

If you are too cool to respond to a message someone sends you, I am happy you feel that way. Personally I am not too cool to reply to anyone. I make time to be here and replying is what I am here for. If you don't want to reply because you don't like our pictures, THANK YOU! I don't have room in my life for shallow people anyway. The absolute best response I have ever received from a woman was "I am not interested, I don't think we match." She and I are still talking! I have the ability to chat without any strings. Try it some time, some people on here are very interesting.

I love your lips when they’re wet with wine
    And red with a wild desire;
I love your eyes when the lovelight lies
    Lit with a passionate fire.
I love your arms when the warm white flesh
    Touches mine in a fond embrace;
I love your hair when the strands enmesh
    Your kisses against my face.

Not for me the cold, calm kiss
    Of a virgin’s bloodless love;
Not for me the saint’s white bliss,
    Nor the heart of a spotless dove.
But give me the love that so freely gives
    And laughs at the whole world’s blame,
With your body so young and warm in my arms,
    It sets my poor heart aflame.

So kiss me sweet with your warm wet mouth,
    Still fragrant with ruby wine,
And say with a fervor born of the South
    That your body and soul are mine.
Clasp me close in your warm young arms,
    While the pale stars shine above,
And we’ll live our whole young lives away
    In the joys of a living love.

The best way to get people to read what you write is to keep it brief. I have come to the conclusion that most people are looking for Ken and Barbie. Let me tell you this, Ken and Barbie suck. They are not real people in that they are fake in their actions. I love my fat wife and she loves me. We may not be pretty as Ken and Barbie but she is one hell of a woman who puts up with me. More to come.

This was a response I gave to this question on another forum.  I thought it would go well here to help explain my comments in our profile about the first wife. . . .

Since this question is asked on a Biblical Poly forum. . . . . In my opinion, all the wives have equal status as they’ve all been made wives.  That being said, not all wives are honored the same.  That depends on the relationship that they’ve created with their husband.  As I see it, biblically, there is always a special honor for the mia wife in a family, usually because the family that the rest of the wives join is one that she was integral in helping to create.  The man would not be a verifiable quality husband without her efforts and involvement, and her perception, attitudes and outlook on life and a poly family proves that he’s the kind of man that can succeed with additional wives.  She will experience and overcome a level of emotional and cultural turmoil that no other wife will be exposed to, and will usually be entrusted with a higher level of trust and responsibility than the other wives.

 

Does this mean that she should “rule” the household?  Most definitely not!  There is one husband and only one head of any household, and a man that has not established and jealously guards his headship is a husband who will fail at poly.  A husband that has not transformed his wife away from these type of feminist tendencies has proven he’s not ready yet IMO.  Any of the wives ruling the house or trying to rule unchecked will bring disaster or gross dissatisfaction with the family unit from all parties.

 

Just my .02. . . . . .

 

*********Props to you on your wife.  Very few men in our culture have a wife that is logically tuned to natural truth that way. With one or two exceptions, most accepting wives that I’ve seen are ok with it primarily because they are anticipating sexual benefits from incoming spouses (with the exception of fundamentalist Mormons who have grown up in the culture and understand the intrinsic benefits)

 

As to the jealousy issue, jealousy is not wrong or evil when its used properly.  Case in point is that God is a jealous God and this means that he is very protective over his people and demands exclusivity.  He also demands loyalty and obedience as a result of this attribute.

For his people to be jealous among themselves over his attention or resources, that is an evil jealousy because it is usurping and manipulative.

 

I personally do not believe that a man is called to polygyny any more than he is called to matrimony.  Both are a natural outcome of choices and decisions and natural desires in a man’s life.   Some men are more prepared for matrimony and polygyny, and some wives are more prepared than others.  I believe that all men have the right, but most will never be successful because most have squandered their credibility and influence as head of their home thru mismanagement of their spousal relationships and finances and parenting.

This doesnt mean that they cannot improve and transform into a husband or wife that would be great at poly, it just means that they’ve usually got a lot of work to do to be ready to take that step. 

After reading through a few blog posts on the site, I noticed that they all seem to come back to this idea that it's god's will or Christ's teachings that are guiding people to this path.  That's all fine and good, but I'm curious if there are others out there that are looking at this type a family unit from a more reasoned approach.  Just for clarification, I'm not suggesting that making choices based off of religious doctrine is impractical or unreasonable or whatever, but more that you are following a path that has been laid out before you.  Not having ever been religious, nor athiestic, I only have a layman's understanding of religion, so I can't and won't judge others based on their beliefs.

As for the practical side of things, I'm refering to basic pros and cons of this type of family.  The biggest appeal to me is the idea of 'more'.  More members of your tribe.  More real coonections.  More skills and ideas in your household.  More people to back you up and for you to back up.  More family members to share the challenges/burdons of child-rearing, home-ownership, and general living.  Now, the 'more' I speak of sounds self-serving, but it's a means to an end.  It allows you to have more time to devote to your loved ones, raise you children into better people, enjoy life, and help your family, friends, neighbors, and even strangers to enjoy their lives more too.  With mre people, each of you requires less time to devote to the ratrace of life, and therefore, more time to devote to yourself and each other.

In a world filled with societies that are seeming more and more predatory, there is strength in numbers, in unity.