theoneo's blog

I was reading a Q&A site recently about polyamory.  In the middle of the response the answerer wrote:


"If you can't do monogamy, then you won't be able to do polygamy."


As tortological as it sounds, this person touched on an important point.  Some people come to polygamy from a desire to be freer than they would get from a monogamous relationship; to have less to do, less to consider or commit to, and more independence.


In polygamy there are more people and a tighter bond between them, which means yes, there are more people who can and will love you, and more people who can and will help you through anything, but that also means more people to care for, more people to be considerate of, more emotion, and more lives to contribute to.  This true for everyone, including the husband.


Many successful monogamous relationships have the same qualities that polygamous relationships do, and many failures of marriages are similar whether they be monogamous or polygamous.


This means, unfortunately, that women suitable for polygamy are probably already in monogamous relationships.  The good news is that this also means there are more women suited to polygamy in the general population than seek it out.  So don't hide your polygamy from people you trust just because they're happily monogamous.


If you're a natural giver, listener, and communicator, then you will find polygamy much easier than monogamy, and you probably already know this from the close friendships you nurture already. :-)

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