User blogs

Peace is everything we are cool calm and collective trying to build an Kingdom!

Hello I would like to introduce myself my name is Monique and I am brand new to the site I have been thinking about this for a while after I got divorced five years ago because lately I’ve been kind of the second will in a relationship so why keep such a gem a secret when she can be out in the open.

 It was not easy to come to this path in life. Some people do it for the "excitement" factor and that can never last. How long can physical relations go ? True relationships are built on common values, common interests and a common vision.

  We are a pretty calm bunch. We were married in April, my original plans were to open a small museum here locally, but no long after getting settled, my wife's headaches got to bad we went to the doctor. The short version is she has damage from an old car wreck. It causes her sometimes to have a hard time with sentences or directions. Sometimes she does not notice simple things others might. She can fall too and that is scary for me.

  We love each other very much, but came to the conclusion quickly that both of us really need a sister wife. Somebody to grow with, do stuff with and share life with. Both of us are technically disabled, but I stay active in business with some travel. She often has visits with doctors and it is difficult for me to always be there to go along.

  There is no real drama between us, I have more arguments with fast food people not getting stuff right than her. We are really good together in temperament, plans, vision, and morals. We are both believers in leave things as they are if you can't improve the situation for sure. Do no harm has real meaning here. This home is violence free among relatives.

  Drop us a line if you want to correspond more.

Dave and Tera 

I was reading a Q&A site recently about polyamory.  In the middle of the response the answerer wrote:

"If you can't do monogamy, then you won't be able to do polygamy."

As tortological as it sounds, this person touched on an important point.  Some people come to polygamy from a desire to be freer than they would get from a monogamous relationship; to have less to do, less to consider or commit to, and more independence.

In polygamy there are more people and a tighter bond between them, which means yes, there are more people who can and will love you, and more people who can and will help you through anything, but that also means more people to care for, more people to be considerate of, more emotion, and more lives to contribute to.  This true for everyone, including the husband.

Many successful monogamous relationships have the same qualities that polygamous relationships do, and many failures of marriages are similar whether they be monogamous or polygamous.

This means, unfortunately, that women suitable for polygamy are probably already in monogamous relationships.  The good news is that this also means there are more women suited to polygamy in the general population than seek it out.  So don't hide your polygamy from people you trust just because they're happily monogamous.

If you're a natural giver, listener, and communicator, then you will find polygamy much easier than monogamy, and you probably already know this from the close friendships you nurture already. :-)

I tend to glance at the list of users who have viewed our profile fairly regularly and saw a profile announcing that the site was full of "fakes and aggressive men" and it inspired me to write a blog post on a topic I have had in mind for a while.

I do not disagree with this person in the slightest in their assessment that the site...and all of the others are likely to be the same realistically... is full of fakes and aggressive men.

The fakes are frequently just simple scammers and honestly you have to be a full on lumphead to fall for the kind of obvious cut and paste from a translator bot message that will pop up. Seriously... does anybody really think that a bunch of girls from Ghana are clambering to get into plural families in the states? Anyway, scams happen all the time and this is the internet boys and girls,  it is part of the environment.  The actual troublesome ones are the fakes from the point of view that they are not serious and are just looking to get an ego stroke or to jack with those plig weirdos or whatever. Tonnes of them on these sites. 

With respect to the aggressive guys, I can just assume that they are the assholes who are either trying to larp polygamy because of some fantasy and again ego stroke issue or they are the sort of douche that has managed to bully or convince their frequently unwilling wives into this search with claims that God is talking to them directly in a big booming voice so he can use her faith against her or some other scam perhaps involving fear of losing financial support for her and her kids. The reason being in the end that he wishes to have regular sexual access to another woman. This sort of beta dickhead is not really going to come in many flavors but aggressive is certainly one of the most popular .

Now don't get me wrong... I am not white  knighting the girls on here at all. They leave so much to be desired that it makes me all the more thankful that I met and married one of the few real gems that really was looking to be part of a plural family. 

The vast majority of woman on here are just simply ill mannered brats that I would not have at all. While a man is absolutely the head of the family, a man should not be forced to reraise a woman he has married and try to undo all of the apparently shoddy work that her parents did in teaching her the bone basics of how to treat people.

I know that just about every serious couple on here who is seeking a sisterwife has experienced the ghosting treatment from the singled women (presuming that they are A. Single B. Women ((what the hell is wrong with people that they have nothing better to do?)) C. Seriously looking for a family instead of screwing around.). They exchange a few messages and or emails and then puff of smoke and the girl is gone. No warning, no 'Thanks but I don't think we are a match' or anything.

Now don't get to thinking I am just being butthurt that some girls ghosted me. A. Noooope. See the profile. Not looking for another wife. Maybe someday but right now we are just trying to network with the community. B. As i previously mentioned, I would not have the ones with such bad manners gift wrapped. I do not wish to spend my life in a contentious marriage with a brat I have to reeducate on courtesy and consideration for others as opposed to the shallow narcissist who can not be bothered considering the time or feelings of others. There are some couples here who really get ahead of themselves emotionally after a few exchanges and while that is not some random girls fault, she should be aware of the effect just blowing them off has. Lots give up just because some woman was not interested in thinking beyond the end of her nose. I/we have been happy to meet and chat with women here but we sure are not going to come out of the gate as anything but plain old friendly and certainly not flirty or whatever.

Yeah I know... 'but a lot of guys are assholes and won't take a polite no'... or 'I get so many emails I am overwhelmed' etc etc. Yeah? Is this your first time on the internet as a female? These are such common issues with such common solutions that I don't see them as valid complaints. Just part of the equation with online seeking of any kind. 

So to my mind the couples who get ghosted by the women with bad manners, just move along and be glad. Glad that you found out about this character flaw after a couple of notes back and forth. Imagine how much worse it would be if it seemed to work out only to have the rug pulled out much further along... I mean that genuinely. It could be so so much worse. Nobody is here, whether it is as a single woman or a couple, to get their emotional guts ripped out. 

I just found this site today after trying others. Please don't anyone judgeme. Like I said I'm very new to this and still learning. On another site I did begin to talk to another couple. I started having feelings for the husband. Then I had a wake up call. It was not the marriage for me and I almost came close to packing up my bags and moving out of state to be with them. The reason I said it was not for me because that marriage was not about me being equal to the husband and first wife. Joining there family would have required me to change myself completely to fit what they desired and for me to be miserable because basically I had to fake it to be with them. It seemed like with the husband it was more about sex. I was considered selfish and unsubmissive if I didn't perform sexually the way he wanted. The wife....i was required to stay home, clean, cook and tend to their children while they worked. That's not what I had planned for myself, even in a monogamous relationship. I wss considered selfish and unsubmissive for not wanting to. Also I had to change my eating, my physical appearance, etc to suit him. I was not allowed to go anywhere outside the house without a family member. The excuse was that wanting to do things on my own was saying I didn't want to be with family. I felt like that was an excuse for just keeping me under watchful eyes. I mean every marriage is different. Some might be willing. I woke up and realise I felt like it was controlling, they was selfish, I was going to be a sex slave, maid and nanny. I was just a grown child. I had no say so, no compromising so I could be happy, nothing about that relationship included me in it. I might be wrong for feeling that way but I experienced other couples only about sex and wanting me to be bisexual. So can someone teach me the true marriage of Poly and set my mind at ease that this is the right thing for me. That all couples are not like that. 

One "traffic" case the appellate judge ruled he didn't have jurisdiction, so now our clock is ticking to file an action on the prosecution.

Second case is a Federal civil rights action and we have less than a week to respond.

Third case is a "traffic case" removal to federal court where we countered and default the Plaintiffs. Our 12/20/2018 response to the federal district court's attempt to remand has kept the case in federal court.

If fighting for justice is part of your thing then checkout our FB "Law Geeks" study group.

Ok, So we have been chatting with someone on this site for about a week. So she is in college supposedly. So i've been texting her and she tells me that i haven't talked to her in 3 days. Well I HAVE! Today she says, I have something to ask you, In school today my professor asked me to pay $550. So can you send it to me and i'll send you the information to where to send it. But I need it by Friday!. That way i can pay it and start my relationship with you. What The H...? Is this normal? I don't know this person except through some text messages. If she was here then I could see helping, or if we WERE in a relationship. But not only after just a week and not really knowing her. Has anyone else been faced it with this and how do you respond? I'm so lost....We have had nothing but bad experiences from these people. We want a honest, committed relationship and we just can't seem to find it in anyone to wont the same. Are we doing something wrong? We need help!

To each their own and all...

That being said, one of the things that is jumping out to me a fair amount is just how many profiles demonstrate that several people are here looking for a good time, for new partners for sexual liaison or seeing the plural marriage pop culture boom and thinking it would be some kind of yolo adventure and that it might be cool for a while. That is what I see in the single women's profiles. In some of the couples profiles however it is far more of the predatory to desperate spectrum and I do not even slightly wonder at the fact that many are mystified by the lack of any response. In other couples profiles you will see the it is all about the ego stroke for the man equation being played out.

At the end of the day, personally I don't particularly care about being perceived as judgemental when so many are approaching plural marriage for all the wrong reasons. All that it will end up with is games being played, hearts being broken and families pulled apart. 

Plural marriage is first and foremost a marriage. It is about love, permanence, giving each other support and the bonds of family. Plural marriage is not about jumping on the latest fad, it is not about your sexual fantasies or pumping up your ego. 

Yeah yeah... standing on my soap box and preaching to an empty room. I know. Lame and pointless. It is frustrating though to browse through the site and see a handful of those who clearly take the idea of polygyny seriously and who are seeking their family or their new wife that are clearly having to wade through a sea of those who might be more suited to plenty of fish or some other hookup app. 

This is supposed to be about love and family not being part of a fad.

I hope you and your loved and beloved ones have a beautiful and memorable day.