User blogs

TheThofsons
Hello my name is Tyler my wifes name is Wanda. We are looking to add a wife to our family and are in Hope's this is a good place to start. We live in Las Vegas 
TheThofsons Mar 31 · Comments: 1
LanaTy
Sometimes, when you go from one place to another...when you are still physically in the "old place"...your heart, mind and soul are also in another "newer place"...even IF you are not really there...yet...  Hmm...


Soon enough I guess!!  

LanaTy Mar 28 · Comments: 1 · Tags: moving, new place, old place, heart, mind, soul
northwoodsbear

What is your relationship founded on? Will it last?


Most people approach marriage and relationships looking for love. You wouldn't marry someone you didn't love. Romance and love are at the heart of our conception of marriage. We dream about finding love. We tell stories about it. Entire industries are devoted to producing movies or books about love.


And you know what? It doesn't work.


Around 44% of all marriages will fail. And if you add a second wife the likelihood one or both leaves skyrockets to 68% (average) and even as high as 90% (typical).


That is failure. Big time. It is no coincidence that we have the 7 year itch. Romance (or erotic love) is transient. It naturally fades with time. This makes it a shaky foundation that makes marriage unstable.


Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying you can't or shouldn't find someone you love to marry. Do that. And also put effort into cultivating and maintaining erotic love within you relationship. But it is not a good foundation, all the more so in polygamy where there is so much more potential for drama, hurt, and loss.


So what is a good foundation?


Many Christians counter this situation saying we need to marry a Christian or have Christ centered marriages. But is that really working either? The divorce rate among Christian's is not much different. In practice this concept often results in people using Christ or religion as an excuse for rebellion, abandonment, or upsetting the Godly order in marriage.


But there is a solution and a better foundation for marriage: Christ-like love.


The Christian New Testament talks a lot about love and even commands men and women to love their spouses. But it doesn't mean love like we mean love. The New Testament scriptures were originally written in Ancient Greek, which has several different words for love. When we think love in relationship we think romantic love. But the word for that in Greek, eros, is not found even once in the New Testament. But what it does talk a lot about is agape love. 


Agape love is the love Christ modeled for us. This is other centered, self-sacrificial, benevolent, forgiving, unconditional love. This love is an action, not a feeling. It is the opposite of selfishness and jealousy. This is the love that can bind us all together stronger than strong. When wives love this love for each other it subsumes and overcomes the conflicts. When husbands love this for their wives it overcomes the hurts, convicts and leads by its example.


"This is My commandment, that you love one another, just as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this, that one lay down his life for his friends. You are My friends if you do what I command you. No longer do I call you slaves, for the slave does not know what his master is doing; but I have called you friends, for all things that I have heard from My Father I have made known to you. You did not choose Me but I chose you, and appointed you that you would go and bear fruit, and that your fruit would remain, so that whatever you ask of the Father in My name He may give to you. This I command you, that you love one another." - John 15:12-17


But how do we achieve this love?


Love is the prime command in Christianity. It is the core principle and thing which must characterize our Christian walk. But to get there, we first must be rightly ordered with God.


"Then Jesus said to His disciples, “If anyone wishes to come after Me, he must deny himself, and take up his cross and follow Me. “For whoever wishes to save his life will lose it; but whoever loses his life for My sake will find it." - Matthew 16:24-25


Being a Christian isn't about what God can do for us or about how it will make our life better, it is about completely submitting ourselves to Christ; for Him to use us as we walk in His commandments. To do that we must surrender our will our selfishness our desire to control our own destiny.


When men and women in marriage have died to self in that way and given up their will to Christ, their life will become characterized by selflessness. When they love Christ they will sacrificially love each other; and love covers a multitude of sins. 


The Fruit


When a man has died to self, he lives a godly example for his wives to follow as he follows Christ.


When a wife has died to herself, she no longer lives selfishly but channels her submission to Christ through her husband as she follows him in his journey for Christ.


When men and women in marriage do this they will come to live their lives according to Godly order. God has established a hierarchy of authority in creation: God -> Christ -> man -> woman -> children (1 Cor 11, Eph 5&6). In scripture, when a woman leaves her family and marries her man she passes from under her fathers authority to her husbands. When she lives under the authority and direction of her husband, she is living in sync with the created order. 


This makes everything easier. No longer is she there just because she wants to be, or because she's feeling feelings of love. She is there because it is her right place in the world as she follows her leader. When divorce is no longer an option, everyone has the incentive to make it work and to stick it out when times get tough. Divorce is the easy out. Couples who stick together through tough times build stronger, happier marriages.


Contrast this with the normal way of marriage: the equal partnership. Equality is an impossibility because when two disagree one must prevail. And that means the marriage set up for a constant struggle for supremacy. And when you throw multiple wives into the mix this situation goes from contentious to impossible.


But when wives follow their husband in love as he follows Christ you get a beautiful oneness that shines forth in their lives with a joy beyond measure. And this oneness of heart, mind, and purpose is how you get lifelong marriage. 


"And if one can overpower him who is alone, two can resist him. A cord of three strands is not quickly torn apart." - Ecclesiastes 4:12

God Bless,


NorthWoodsBear



LanaTy
...we're sure if anyone out there has EVER moved from one place to another...How grueling the process can be! We're in the stage of inspections and requests from the buyers (us in some instances!) to fix things or have things adjusted.  This is, what I remember from just last JULY, was that there is absolutely NO WAY around any of this...IF you really want to buy a house and sell another!!


Good thing we have our love to keep us steady and moving forward!


Peace out Everyone and Peace Be With You!


Ty & Lana

connies
just wanted to say hi to everyone!  havent done this before so not sure what to expect.  I try to get on here at least once a week.  little nervous about this but thought it would be nice to meet new people and make new friends, who knows where or how it will go.  

 

connies Mar 21 · Comments: 3
Kiachamp3100
Looking for a third in Cali if anyone is interested
LanaTy
We sold our house AND bought another...almost in the same day!! YIKES!!! And WOW!!

we're gonna love the older home but more than anything a nice quiet neighborhood!!


Can't wait...except for...all the packing etc.!!  YIKES and DOUBLE WOW!! LOL!!


We are excited!!

sarahs23
Looking for a polygamist couple looking for a single female. I would love to date and possibly build a future.
sarahs23 Mar 17 · Comments: 3
Mea2016
Love is meant to be multiplied not divided by jealousy. This is a calling not a lifestyle for everyone..
Mea2016 Mar 16 · Comments: 2
Countrynerds
So I'm sitting here at the local truckers cafe writing this. You know when you renovate your home things get destroyed? Like your walls and suddenly your bathroom is in transition. What was ( and shortly will be again ) a home, is like a strange camping experience. We needed to do a renovation but I never knew the physical pain and the emotional struggle that redoing a house brought on. Austin is trying to get everything wrapped up, but the truth is, we are in limbo. We both work and the people who did the last renovation, well they shouldn't have been allowed to do anything. Wires put together with duct tape, Sheetrock over holes ( basically nothing between the exterior and that Sheetrock), and a lot of other things that even I, an amateur at this, can see is wrong. Who let these people add on to their home Willy Billy ? I mean they must have been drinking and getting bored and suddenly they remembered they had some lumber and Sheetrock outside. Anyway, we are correcting things and getting to put our personal touch on the house. Paint colors, bathroom redesign, adding a screened in patio which is my favorite. Going to turn the house into an oasis, as long as we can get on the same page with the design. It means that I have to give up some things like using wifi at home but hopefully everything will be put back together in the next couple months. The warmer weather will help. What colors look good with grey cabinets in the kitchen? I'm debating on a few but what do you think?
Countrynerds Mar 14 · Comments: 1 · Tags: paint colors, remodeling, advice
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