User blogs

qwnsknight

One "traffic" case the appellate judge ruled he didn't have jurisdiction, so now our clock is ticking to file an action on the prosecution.

Second case is a Federal civil rights action and we have less than a week to respond.

Third case is a "traffic case" removal to federal court where we countered and default the Plaintiffs. Our 12/20/2018 response to the federal district court's attempt to remand has kept the case in federal court.


If fighting for justice is part of your thing then checkout our FB "Law Geeks" study group.

Julie_Robby2603
Ok, So we have been chatting with someone on this site for about a week. So she is in college supposedly. So i've been texting her and she tells me that i haven't talked to her in 3 days. Well I HAVE! Today she says, I have something to ask you, In school today my professor asked me to pay $550. So can you send it to me and i'll send you the information to where to send it. But I need it by Friday!. That way i can pay it and start my relationship with you. What The H...? Is this normal? I don't know this person except through some text messages. If she was here then I could see helping, or if we WERE in a relationship. But not only after just a week and not really knowing her. Has anyone else been faced it with this and how do you respond? I'm so lost....We have had nothing but bad experiences from these people. We want a honest, committed relationship and we just can't seem to find it in anyone to wont the same. Are we doing something wrong? We need help!
Julie_Robby2603 Mar 13 · Comments: 6
Noblebeau
My first blog post was more serious....now lets have some fun.  Who are we?  And what is our life like?


We love to get outside!  We enjoy the indoors too, movies, dinners, games with friends....but when we can we go outside.   We have horses and love to ride them.  We have motor x bikes and love to ride them.  We love dogs...but currently don't have one    We get out and go backpacking and enjoy the exercise and the peaceful places we find out here in the west.  We also go to Yellowstone, Disney, snorkel and play in the Bahamas every year.  We like the Olympic National Park by Seattle.  We love to backpack into the Wind River Range of Wyoming.  We also just hang out and ride mountain bikes on the world famous Slik Rock in Moab.


We are animal lovers too.  But, we realize that we are not vegans...so we eat meat and the best source of meat, and the most humane way to get that meat, is to hunt it like our ancestors once did.  So, we go hunting and enjoy the woods together each fall when the Aspen trees here in the west turn yellow and the snow dusts the peaks.  We teach the boys...and the girls that will come .... how to care for the meat, take it home, and then make it into soup, roasts, and jerky.   100% natural and the cleanest and most humane source you can find.


She loves to cook, to ride horses, to hunt, travel, catch some sun in the Caribbean,  spend time with her friends, and have fun anyway possible, play cards with the ladies, ya know...fun!


We love life!  We have so much fun together.  We want you to come too!  Friends or whomever.  Lets go party in the outdoors!  Then go to dinner....filet mignon at our place

Noblebeau

Growing up, even as a young boy, I always knew there was more.  I grew up and was raised as a Mormon boy with all the great things that includes like becoming a Boy Scout, learning to speak in front of congregations of 500 people, playing basketball, studying the Bible, and going on campouts with the guys.  It was great but something was missing.  I read about polygamy in our history and I, even though young, understood why they would choose to live that lifestyle.  It made sense to me even at the very young age of 12 years old.  I had never met a family that had a plural life but I could imagine the happiness it could bring. As I grew older I knew that "we", as humans, as people, as spirits, were capable of so much more that what our society was telling us was "normal".  Not because it would make a god, or the God, happy....but because it would make life here better, happier, and more complete.....if done correctly...if the people involved understood how to live "the right way" with each other.  (the "right way" is subjective but a later blog post I hope


I grew up Mormon but left for a time.  I was married and had babies.   Then, realizing I didnt like how tough some of our culture was and how devoid of any thought towards a spiritual life many people were, I decided to go back to the Mormon (LDS) faith to help me instill morals and God into the hearts of my children.  It was important for me to raise my babies with a sense of who God was, that they are important to me and to themselves, and that they were with others who were striving to be moral and good people.  However, as time wore on I could see the "childishness" of the religion.  The requirement to do certain things that didnt make sense to me on any level.  The requirement to be something that seemed only for mans sake and not something that a god would want.  And at some point I realized that I knew more about life and spirituality than those that were teaching me and my children. So I took the best of what the LDS church had taught me and decided to be independent but moral, brave but humble, religious but not relentless, meek but not mild.  I would teach my children the best of what I had found.  And free them from the burden of religion.  And be more enlightened about our spiritual side of life.  


I remember feeling so free when I realized that I do believe in a God, but if there was a God, he would love me as a person no matter where I went to church, even in my own front room, or on a camping trip with my family, that if there was a God, he would want me to succeed and to return to be wherever he is and be happy.  That he would not look down on me for wanting more, for loving more, in fact, he would find joy in my joy as I wanted to make a larger family and see all of them experience the joy of living in a home that was full of love, soft-spoken words, activities to build relationships, and so much more.  I realized that society and structure had created a family system that was breaking down.  A monogamous structure giving men too much power and leaving women alone, tired, and afraid.  I realized that men and women are different.  I want to love and protect her and my children.  And she wanted more bond with the women around her. And, the way to have true happiness was to love more, be more, do more, and to give more.


Some men, and some women, though mostly men, would be horrible at living this lifestyle and would damage homes, mothers, and lives.  To live this lifestyle I can see that the father of the home needs to be gentle with children, ensure situations are dealt with in a soft tone and with love, and fathers need to work and secure the needs and wants of the family, additionally fathers need to set an example of loving others and being respectful, but most of all they need to create a safe home, a place where little ones can grow and become whatever it is they are meant to become.  Understanding, compassion, love, trust, charity, and confidence that he is doing the right thing to help those around him...those are the foundation to a sound family relationship and a beautiful home where children can become so much more.  And where women are empowered, supported, find companionship, and thrive as they each reach their goals with the support of sisters.


I would have 1000 wives if I could.  It is not about physical intimacy, although that is important, but it is about wanting to spread my arms and gather in all the sweet, amazing, sad, and lonely people I see.  I see so many women wanting a man but realizing their options are young men with an uncertain future and no responsibility.  They either can choose a young immature man or find one that has had many divorces, has baggage and has proven not to be able to build a house for a family.  So many women are left by their husbands and now caring for their babies and the extra burden of finances.  Anna understands and supports my desire to help and love those around me.  However, I can only do so much directly.  I can see that if a husband takes on too much responsibility then his family suffers.  There is a balance that needs to be found in order to create the best harmony in a families life.  So as much as I would help thousands, I can only realistically reach a few directly.  Perhaps 3 women under my roof and their babies.  And, as a family we will reach out and help others and as a team, as a family, we will help hundreds....and more.  


As I have emailed some women here letting them know I would be interested in getting to know them better I have worried that they won't know my feelings about life and love and family and will just assume I am like other men in the world that seek physical intimacy only.  I have sought to put here, in writing, a description of what can be, a recipe for happiness that I ascribe to, a way of life that brings harmony, and a commitment that I am willing to give to whomever next blesses my life with theirs.  We are excited to meet her, eager to find her, and love the idea of what can be, but not for the same reasons the rest of the world gets excited.  We want to give more, love more, and ultimately be more.  And not just for a minute, a year, or a fleeting time.  We are a forever family.  We believe that people who marry and have children should only do so when they are ready to commit for life....or God willing....eternity.   Through thick and thin we love and encourage each other.  Loyalty to each other and to the children will set a foundation upon which love can work to create a family and a future some only dream of.  And, in this lifestyle, love and abundance will be flowing from multiple directions to each other at all times.  We, as a team, as a family, will create.... heaven on earth if you will.


I put this here because you are wondering, who is he, what is his intention in contacting me, why, when, where?  Now you know a little about who I am.  The rest of the questions can be answered quickly if you have any....just say Hi. 


Know that if you say hello we understand that it is a simple hello.  We know it will take time to get to know each other.  At least we will get the chance to possibly make a new friend.  And that is worth it.  We are excited to meet new friends and people that believe as we do and to create a future and a life that is more full of everything.


Whatever your circumstance, whatever your past, know that I am here, we are here, a safe place in the storm, a heaven on earth, a warm place to grow.  


Come find me, come find us, come if you are ready and willing to be a part of a something bigger, to be more, to spread love, to enjoy life, to be........................a family.

Noblebeau Mar 11 · Tags: family, love, forever, trust, god
DanSmith
Pretty short on this topic, but it was an eye opener for me that I should be a little more transparent with my kids about some of our potential life decisions. I had an interesting encounter with my daughter today about polygamy, and I figured some of you might get a laugh or at least share the pain.

I was on my phone this morning responding to a couple messages on Sisterwives when my oldest daughter (Hannah/8) trots over and gives me what I thought to be a hug. After a second, she acts startled and yells out "DAD, ARE YOU LOOKING FOR A SISTERWIFE???" Apparently, she had started reading my private conversations while giving me a quick hug. (Despite my best attempts, my children at times have no regard for manners or personal space.) Either it was a lack of understanding the privacy of an IM, or she was simply snooping to see what I was doing, but she quickly deduced that I must be looking around for another wife. Oh boy.

After that outburst, Hannah started getting upset with me. I assume it's probably due to jealousy for her mother (coming to her defense as her father was "stepping out" as she interpreted it), so I couldn't get upset with her righteous indignation. I'm glad that she is defensive of her mother and will even go to bat with Dad if I'm not treating Mom well by her interpretation. I gave Hannah some background as to why we are on Sisterwives, and simply told her that we're being open to the possibilities. I didn't go into everything, but I gave her enough to help answer some questions.

Anyway, my lesson from this is while the husband/wife might be open and on the same page with polygamy, it might be worth mentioning to your older children what possibilities you are opening your family up to. You will need to decide what your children might be ready for. Either way, don't let them find out by snooping on your phone... it's much more difficult playing defense than offense .

(In Hannah's defense, after we started talking it turns out her biggest concern was that she didn't want a baby brother since girls are so much better....... I can only hope and pray that she keeps that attitude for the next 12 years.)
DanSmith Mar 9 · Comments: 4 · Tags: family, funny, lifelesson
DanSmith
We've had a couple discussions with ladies and some of them seem unsure of what questions to ask new families. So, here are some of my thoughts on questions that women should be asking or thinking of when it comes to investigating new families. These questions are in no particular order, and these questions may not apply to everyone, and it's certainly not a "catch-all". It's only meant as a potential starting point.


While I am pointing this to the newer women joining the site and looking at polygamy for the first time, I think everyone (families included) should be considering these questions when approaching someone new.
Q: Does the family in question line up with your religious beliefs and political/moral beliefs?
A: Let's get this one out first... I believe that in order to make a family successful, families should have the same religious beliefs and moral direction. Obviously, nobody will agree on everything 100% of the time. However, there seem to be a few topics that can make or break relationships and it usually will revolve around these topics. Discussing the differences between your values will help you understand if the relationship can work.

Q: Have you prayed or mediated on the family/woman in question?
A: To quote someone that I respect: "I don't ask God for favors or for wishes. But, I do think that if you sit on the edge of your bed, and things aren't going very well for you, and you ask what foolish thing you're doing to make it worse that you'll get an answer right now. And it won't be the one you want, but it might be the one that if you listen to it would set things straight."

Wherever you sit on the religious/spiritual spectrum (or don't in some cases), self reflection or prayer helps to build emotional self-awareness. Take time and ask yourself the important and sometimes uncomfortable questions. In any marriage, your weaknesses and strengths will be shown. Learn how to understand your emotions, your strengths, your weaknesses, and ultimately what is driving you to a particular family.

Q: Do you share similar life goals or dreams? If not, can you be happy living in a different way?
A: I'll offer myself up as an example. Our family is going to build a homestead. No, I don't expect that I'll begin to earn my living this way. However, I love the concept of growing gardens and raising my own animals for food. This might be a silly example, but someone that cannot stand the outdoors or that is vegan might not enjoy my bacon-loving, cow-milking lifestyle. They might be able to compensate for awhile, but unless they change their lifestyle or we change ours, it's a possible contention point.

Q: Does the family expect you to relocate?
A: Obviously, there are many variables to consider, but if you're joining a family that is established (has a mortgage, been there 10+ years, kids are enrolled in school and programs, etc.), you might be the one most able to accommodate a change. Is that something you're willing to do, or is the family happy to move around your needs?

Q: Along with the question above, does the family have enough space to accommodate you (and potential children)?
A: I've known lots of families that squished to make everyone fit... not saying it's a bad thing at all, some families love the squish! It's simply another consideration.

Q: Is there a big age difference? Do you want to have more children, and is your potential husband in a position to raise them?
A: To me, age difference is just a number in most cases. My wife has a sister that married into a polygamous family and her husband is about 21 years her senior, and she's as happy as can be. That being said, if your husband is much older than you, raising children is going to be different. If your husband is having children into his late 40's or 50's, speaking candidly he might not be able to help with child rearing. 

I knew one man who married a much younger woman, and he specifically told her that he only wanted a couple of kids at most. His concern was not watching them grow up in case something happened to him. That really stuck out in my mind, and I'm glad he addressed it. And NO, this is not a knock against older men... just a fact of life.

Q: What are the sleeping arrangements?
A: While this might seem silly, there is a group (however small) of people that take different approaches to how husbands and wives sleep... sometimes even in the same bedroom. Now, I'll never judge another family and what they do. I just know that I'm traditional, and I believe every wife should have her own master bedroom at the minimum. Everyone needs their own space.

Along with the housing, something else to consider is are you all going to be living in the same house, or do you all require your own house to live in? Just some more considerations.

Q: Do you understand their love types?
A: If you don't, take a basic love type test and find out what they are. If they are a physical contact type and you're a words of affirmation type, you'll need to know that there are differences in how to react and show love. This will save you TONS of miscommunication later in the relationship.

Q: Have you mentally and spiritually prepped for the critics?
A: No, I don't believe you should ever listen to those who are critical of your life, simply because they don't understand or agree with you. However, this lifestyle does draw criticism and you can be sure you'll get it from your own family. Be prepared to hear it, face it, and do your best to have a thick skin.

Q: Does the husband want more wives after you join into the family?
A: I've seen women be happy to join into a family, but have a hard time accepting new wives join. Every woman will go through emotions as the family changes (honestly, EVERYONE goes through emotional hardship at times), and there's a good chance that it never comes up. However, be open to the concept that it could happen.

Q: Do you think you can become best friends with the wife/wives in the family?
A: Some women are simply amazing when it comes to opening up their home to a new wife. And I've seen times where the "first" wife couldn't/wouldn't be friends with the new wife. As important as the husband and wife relationship is, the wives should all have their own relationship outside of the husband. In my words, I'd hope they could be "besties".

Q: Are you ready to accept other children as your own?
A: Obviously, this is a question most everyone is confronted with BEFORE they even decide they want to be in a polygamous family. However, living with other children and accepting and loving them as your own are two different things. The successful families that I know make the distinction that it's "their family", not "her family" or "my family". Obviously, the children have a birth mother and she does have a special relationship with her own children (which I think shouldn't be downplayed or thrown under foot), but I believe that the other wife(s) should understand that they're adoptive mothers, for lack of a better word, and they should be as invested in those children as everyone else.

DanSmith Mar 5 · Comments: 4 · Tags: families, questions
Gr510
So I just have alot on my mind and i'm sure a lot of people probably wont read this post but I just need to get some things down in writing. 


So my fiance and I joined this site in search of a sister wife or more of a triad relationship. It seems like alot of people on here aren't serious about what they're looking for or message you once then you never hear from them again. We aren't here for a hook up or that "unicorn" We are very serious about our search for someone who will be long term. Part of our life forever. But where do we look? Should we just give up? We have been searching everywhere for quite some time and are getting a little frustrated.


Are there no girls out there that actually want to live the lifestyle we want? Are there no girls out there that are as serious as we are? We have so much love to share but can't find that "one" who wants what we do. It seems as though finding someone to share your life with is harder than we had planned. Everyone tells us to be patient but for how long? We have been looking for almost 2 years now with not really anyone that is serious.


Does anyone have any advice or some suggestions on what we should do?

Gr510 Mar 2 · Comments: 11 · Tags: polyamorous, triad
AB6280
Get a bit shaken up when the female in the couple reaches out.  I think (I am the female in the couple) it is very healthy when the woman reaches out - at least you know she likes you for something not just she is interested in a physical relationship.  Even though some women are interested in that but still there should be nothing to shake them up.  


I notice if I reach out and just say "Hi" they will respond and chat until they realize its a female then it goes dead and they disappear.  If I reach out and say "Hello, this is Adriana and I like your profile and we like to know you more- and NO I am not Bi"  I never hear back from them.  Their profile says they want friendship with the couple and sisterhood with the female but their actions completely different, maybe one or two did respond and I will be darn they wanted a sexual relationship with both of us, something I can't do.  


Anyone else notices that? 

AB6280 Feb 28
nightriders71
Hi We have been talking about this for a long time and decided to see if we could find someone to join our family  I am 63 yrs old  and like to spend time reading or putting puzzles to gather, listening to music I myself like Country but I like 50's 60's and 70's rock and roll also.
DanSmith

I was feeling a little frustrated about a couple of things, so I thought I'd write them down. Not looking for praise or even approval if you're offended by it, just need to voice my thoughts.  FYI, this is Dan speaking.)

To start, I need to "set the table" a little...

My background is that I grew up in a polygamous family in Salt Lake City (I was raised as a fundamentalist Mormon). I was raised in a religious background where it was commonplace to have a couple of wives by your late 20's. There was an intense pressure to ensure you were living polygamy. If you didn't, something was probably wrong with you since you weren't striving to "live Gods law".

In the last few years, I've had a few experiences that changed my religious viewpoints. Mostly, it was understanding that God loves me, wants the best for me, and that He wants me to love others as He does... pretty simply, right? Well, I never really understood it until I came to the conclusion that God ACTUALLY loved ME as an individual. It's a simple thing, but I finally had experiences where I knew and understood that God loves me for me. The last few years of my life I've felt more like I'm walking in Gods steps than I ever have before. It has excited me more than I can describe! It's almost like I'm in a footrace and have just been given the ability to run. It's simply amazing.

As I dove into scripture, I kept uncovering more and more evidence against my belief structure on polygamy, being that it was a "requirement" to fulfill Gods law. As I read and understood scriptures in more detail ---even the words of our own early religious leaders--- I found that many instances of what our beliefs were founded upon weren't actually scriptural. It was simply someone's opinion which turned into "modern-day" prophecy (though I would call it dogma).

As it stands now I can see many instances where polygamy can be damaging for families. I grew up and saw families who weren't supported by the husband/father; I saw times where the mothers HAD to work because they couldn't rely on their husband; I saw children who never knew their father, and their father never knew them; I saw times where women, of their own choice, joined into families simply because it was the "correct" thing to do, though they knew they would never have a REAL family. Sure, they would have children and roommates, but it was never a cohesive family; I saw families where the fathers were simply chasing skirts, where women became a number that they could add to their achievement list.

Despite my viewpoints on polygamy changing, I can still find benefits in polygamy. As a man, it's my natural inclination to want to protect others. (Personally, I'm very protective of my family... Laura calls me the family guard dog, because I tend to act like a dog barking at everything that might be shown as even mildly aggressive towards my family.) As a husband, father, and protector, I feel it's my responsibility to offer a home/family to women/children in need. I can see the benefits for a woman who has come from a bad home, relationship, etc., being able to live in a nurturing home where she's accepted and loved for who she is. Some people have told me it sounds like a"charity" family, to which I say "YES, IT IS!". Do we not think it's charity that God allows us to live, breathe, eat, have families, and be allowed to make mistakes and find forgiveness? We might live in a society where charity is frowned upon, but Newsflash, our entire life is built upon it. Learn to accept it, be grateful when you receive it, and cherish when you can pass it on.
In essence, as God showed me in the past, I want to love others simply because I love THEM. Not because I love the "polygamy lifestyle", or because it's a requirement, but because I LOVE THEM.
A few weeks ago, I told God in prayer that I was happy, willing, and would volunteer opening up our home for another woman looking for a family if He desired it. I felt compelled to open an account here and at least put the "vibes" out to the universe as it were and see what happens. 

Since I've joined the website, I have felt very conflicted in how to approach the community, or even trying to make friends at times with women. I've heard from several ladies that they get inundated with messages from couples or families wanting to get to know them. Go figure, it's a dating site.... and while I'm sure it's generally innocent, I think most new-comers feel like a piece of meat being paraded around the dinner hall. I would wager that most ladies are coming here without much experience in polygamy, and while they might feel drawn to it, it's easy to get overwhelmed. Again, I'm sure it's generally innocent since most couples are probably excited about the lifestyle and want to share and love as I do, but I think it can muddy the water.

My whole purpose with getting onto this website was to open myself up and go through my own spiritual journey. I know that our family is open to the idea of adding to our family, but I don't want to pursue new relationships and force things to happen. I want things to happen because they are meant to. When/If the time ever comes that someone wants to join our family, I want it to be because we love them for them, and they love us for us. I want it to be honest, virtuous love.
I believe that you find what you are searching for in this life, good or bad. I want my pursuits to be good, honest, and for the betterment of my family and others. Yes, I want to find women and families that I can help by being a good husband/father to them. However, I don't think this is as simple as finding someone with a flat tire and changing it for them (cue Bill Murray in Groundhog Day). I want to open my life up to the possibilities, and know that when the time comes that it's meant to be.
So, how does all this come back to "searching for a Sisterwife"? I'm coming to the conclusion that searching out or trying to pursue new wives is backwards. While I plan on continuing being a part of this community, I am going to caution myself, and any others that need it, that we should keep our heads, morals, and sights held high. While it might be coming from a good place in most people's hearts, it's a new way of life for many women and I believe we should tap the brakes a little when someone new joins the website. Perhaps I have misconceptions from my past and seeing men pursue polygamy the way they did, but I have seen the same pursuit exhibited here in some degree or another.
If you truly desire the chance to open your home to a woman/family in need, it will come in time. Let's allow a safe space for women and their children to interview and research the polygamous lifestyle. Let them reach out and ask questions. If they're attracted to your family, allow them space to reach out and initiate contact. I'm afraid many women get turned off by the amount of responses they get, and see desperation more than optimism. Let's create a safe culture, give people freedom to explore, and honor their decisions if they pursue this lifestyle or not.

DanSmith Feb 25 · Rate: 5 · Comments: 14
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