Polyamory Can Heal Your Relationship

Aug 7 '2020, 12:57 PM | By Chris

No relationship will ever be without a struggle from time to time. 

Friendships and family relationships get tested over time just like our 

intimate relationships or marriages. No two people are able to love 

every single thing about each other. Tolerance and forbearance are often 

key. Once you start going after every little thing that annoys you or 

are constantly picking a loved one apart, the relationship is at a high 

risk of failure. You see this all the time. Some of what you thought 

were the best relationships end up at each other's throats even in the 

public eye. Maintaining long term partnerships takes a lot of patience 

and work. What if you discovered a source of new energy, new 

perspectives, and fresh adventures you and your partner could share? 

What if the answer to your stagnation and frustrations is simply 

expanding your relationship? Polyamory could be the answer to your 


Before completely dismissing this idea as preposterous, let's cover a 

few things. How many relationships are ruined, or at least are 

permanently damaged, by cheating? One of the main causes of cheating is 

an inability to be honest about attractions and desires that are outside 

the bounds of the general standards of monogamy. Even if a couple never 

acts on any poly persuasions, simply opening up this channel of honesty 

can bring two people closer together. Why keep an entire part of 

yourself closed off from a person you love so deeply? By the way, 

polyamorous relationships also don't have to be sexual at all. There are 

many ways to express love and intimacy that don’t involve sexual 

activity. Adopting a polyamorous lifestyle offers a life in which you 

and your partner actually end up with more control over the destiny of 

your relationship. You set the rules, you define the boundaries, and you 

decide what’s best for the expression of love in your life and 


Imagine you’re a woman that’s married to a wonderful husband, but you 

notice his wandering eye occasionally and you think it’s cute. You don’t 

feel threatened by it. He, however, may fight to hide the fact he ever 

looks at another woman because he’s terrified of hurting you, or even 

making you feel insecure. There are a couple ways this can turn out. One 

is to continue ignoring the reality that your husband finds other women 

attractive and keep a sort of wedge between the two of you. Another is 

to tell him it’s not a problem and you’re happy he has a healthy sexual 

appetite. This could even create an entire new way for the two of you to 

bond sexually. Maybe you’ve even thought of becoming a sister wife 

already, and you’re excited he has a sexual interest in other women. 

Finding a sister wife together and expanding your family could be the 

perfect solution for a man with a high sex drive, or a woman that would 

simply enjoy bonding with another woman over a shared husband. It’s 

important to be open minded and support the dreams of the people you 

love even if it means experimenting with a little polygamy dating and 

exploration. This also should work both ways. If your wife has a strong 

interest in other men (or women) you should keep an open mind and be 

open to growing your family instead of forcing anyone to quell their 

healthy natural desires.

It’s very easy to insist on sticking with the status quo. Trying 

something daring and new can be too scary, too risky, and the fear of 

judgment is a massive deterrent. The world of polyamory is often viewed 

negatively by people that have worked so hard on their monogamous 

relationships. None of this means you need to limit your love or 

experience to please the world around you. If two people truly love each 

other they should be able to explore anything together. Allowing for 

exploration will bring two people closer together, and in ways they 

likely never imagined. Sexuality is complex. If your husband or wife, or 

partner, express an interest in someone of the same sex it doesn’t mean 

it ever has to happen, but it does mean you should help them explore 

those feelings. It’s important to bring up homosexuality because, unless 

your idea is to explore other people separately, one of you will likely 

encounter a homosexual experience, homo-adjacent at least. You need to 

be prepared for it. Watch some videos, maybe, and decide your limits. 

Exploring polyamory and sexuality with your partner does not mean you 

have to perform, or receive, unwanted sexual behavior. It’s not about 

making yourself feel violated, it’s about helping your lover find their 

full potential.

Too many relationships spend too much time putting on the public 

performance expected of them and growing old while resentment and 

desperation set in so deep they can’t escape it. It doesn’t mean the 

love isn’t there, but the love has become an afterthought to the 

excessive sacrifice they’ve unnecessarily forced on each other. As wild 

as becoming a polygamous family, or inviting more lovers into your home, 

may sound it may be the perfect way to break out of the emotional prison 

monogamy can become. Your polyamorous experience with the love of your 

life can be as extreme or light as will work for your situation. As 

mentioned before, sex is not a requirement in order to have a 

polyamorous relationship. Any intimate relationship that involves more 

than your average friendly time spent, and deeper commitments, can be 

considered a polyamorous bond. People really shouldn’t be so afraid of 

the poly label. Having more than one person with which to share intimacy 

in your life can sometimes be the glue that holds everyone in your 

relationships together. The level of sexuality preferred among a 

polyamorous group or polygamous family should be determined by a fair 

assessment of the comfort levels of everyone involved. This can, and 

should, evolve over time.

Truth be told, most adults are involved in a polyamorous relationship at 

some point in life even if they’ve never pursued a poly or polygamous 

date. It’s impossible for humans to avoid strong emotional connections 

with other humans at different points and places in their lives. The 

expression of those connections are often boxed with just being a good 

friend, but sometimes the bonds are even stronger than those of a 

husband and wife. We limit ourselves, and our loved ones, through our 

desperation to define and label everything too much. Part of opening up 

to poly relationships is realizing you can’t stop an emotional bond that 

is meant to be. It’s better to work with it and let life evolve in 

constructive and positive ways. We should be helping our loved ones grow 

and encouraging them to maintain a healthy sexual and emotional life. 

Find the boundaries you can handle, open your heart and mind, and let 

life flow through you and your loved ones without desperately grasping 

at the guise of control. In letting go we can find true love, and an 

ability to share it with no bounds.

Published By: Christopher Alesich 

Matchmakers, Inc: Sisterwives.com


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