Chris's article

Kody has been struggling to find consensus among his four wives about a grand plan to build out their new family compound in Coyote Pass near Flagstaff, Arizona. On top of this struggle the family faces keeping each sister wife and their kids in homes apart from each other. So far, the houses they’ve left behind in Las Vegas have not sold, so the financial situation isn’t allowing the new builds to proceed as soon as previously planned. The new grandbaby is a lovely distraction for the family (spoiler alert in this article, btw), but the pressures of living apart and facing uncertainty has tempers flaring and it’s affecting the kids as well. Let’s dig in.


The land in Coyote Pass is stunning. It’s an idyllic western landscape and it seems like Kody is trying hard to make each of the four homes for his wives as close to their individual dreams as possible. Janelle and Christine seem to be the most prepared to do whatever it takes to find stability for now then build as soon as possible. Meri and Robyn are a very different story. Quite frankly, Meri is making everything far more difficult than the family should allow. She’s all over the place and seems unwilling to make up her mind. It’s as though she prefers the drama, which is not much of a surprise. Meri might not even want to live in Coyote Pass and creating roadblocks for the family might be her intention. Her behavior does not suggest that she’s acting with anyone’s best interest at heart. She can claim she wants to be there in Flagstaff with the family all she wants. Her actions are making it hard to believe. Hopefully she will eventually realize she’s being too difficult and adjust her approach. It’s doubtful she even has to move again now like she’s claiming. Is she just desperate for more of the spotlight? As Robyn says, every plot on the property is absolutely beautiful. They are not victims of anything no matter where the houses are built. Robyn is also being difficult, but her motivation for it does make sense. She has no choice but to move again and she’s truly afraid that buying a home right now could delay the builds to the point that her kids won’t grow up with their whole family. Her insistence on getting the family all to one place as soon as possible comes from a good intent. Once they find the right home to buy her, for now, and she realizes it can be an income property once she moves to Coyote Pass, it’s doubtful that she’ll continue hindering the most logical way forward. 


Kody shows surprising candor when discussing the situation and the difficulties of plural marriage. He suggests that he’s like the little brother to four sisters at times, not even the big brother. He admits that everyone in a plural marriage considers getting out. It can feel impossible. The women will struggle at times with feelings of a lack of affection and a man with sister wives will feel overwhelmed by them frequently. The bond Meri, Robyn, Christine, and Janelle show in these episodes is beautiful. You can see that they love each other very much and, for the most part, give each other unconditional love and support. Kody is in rare form for a few sound bites expressing his frustrations. He suggests he should put his foot down and tell each wife that they get what they get. “Suck it up, buttercup” is uttered in one of his one-on-ones with the audience and it’s very funny. It’s just not his character to be so harsh. He might be correct. More might be accomplished if he were tougher about it, but his sister wives are no pushovers. They each have strong personalities and clear demands about the homes they want.  Meri, again, seems the most distant and unhelpful, but the love she has for the family is clearly still there. Being a good sister wife is important to these ladies. 


It’s very hard to watch all four sister wives pass up on the opportunity for one big house to share. It would be so much easier to get it built and could be done in a way to give everyone all the space and amenities they need. Sharing utilities, a roof, and all that land to explore could be so rewarding. Even the kids get it! The kids think one huge house would be amazing (and they’re right)! The wives are letting past experiences have too much power. Having to adjust an existing home to share would be terrible, yes. Building a giant home from scratch would avoid all the issues they refuse to live with again. They always find some common ground and are absolutely correct this time too. Kody suggests moving double wide trailers onto the property for temporary homes and they all flatly refuse. This can come across as elitist at first, but they each talk about their experiences having already lived in trailers. This was wonderful insight into how down-to-earth and human this family is. Not wanting the family under that kind of stress ever again is a way to protect the love they all share. 


Speaking of love! The grandbaby drama is a perfectly fun distraction. Janelle is infectiously excited about Maddie and Caleb’s new baby. She coaxes Maddie to reveal the gender to her before the reveal party to the rest of the family and she is so tickled about it, it’s adorable. When the rest of the family finds out ‘It’s a Girl’ the moment of joy is palpable. This is a family full of love. Janelle might seem so easy about the property situation because she’s overjoyed about her grandbaby. She’s doing a fabulous job of sharing calm clarity with her sister wives and keeping them talking. She’s also absolutely right about a little park on the property and an agreement that explicitly guarantees everyone access to the pond. The family needs to let her lead as much as she can until the property is built out. Kody is showing his wisdom by letting Janelle lead when she can. 


Kody is also showing an admirable ability to love all of his children. Telling Robyn’s kids about the move and letting them give feedback shows he and Robyn are raising them well. It’s difficult to see the dream of one big happy family at Coyote Pass melting away from the older kids’ hearts. Robyn has expressed that she’s upset about broken promises to her children and Kody needs to realize the family cohesiveness he desires is at stake if things don’t start developing soon. Aurora, their teenage daughter, cannot handle the stress of another move to possibly another rental, or worse, a house they’ll buy that’s not on the property. She begins to stutter, she grows clearly upset, and she goes into a full panic attack. This moment sums up the situation for the entire family right now. They are a family in panic mode. Kody carries her up the stairs and tries to keep her calm until everything, hopefully, is better. 









Published By: Christopher Alesich 

Matchmakers, Inc: Sisterwives.com


Polyandry (/plunder, plan-/; Greek: - poly-, "many" and v and, "man") is a type of polygamy in which a woman marries two or more men at the same time. Polygyny, on the other hand, involves one male and two or more females. Polyamory, group, or conjoint marriage refers to a wedding that includes a plural number of "husbands and wives" members of each gender. Polyandry refers to sexual encounters with numerous guys within or outside of marriage in its widest sense.


There were 186 monogamous groups among the 1,231 societies described in the 1980 Ethnographic Atlas; 453 had occasional polygyny, 588 had more frequent polygyny, and 4 had polyandry. Polyandry is less common than this number implies, as it solely considers cases discovered in the Himalayan mountains (28 societies). Polyandry is practiced in more than 50 other civilizations, according to current research.


Tibetans in Nepal, portions of China, and northern India practice fraternal polyandry, in which two or more brothers marry the same lady and have equal "sexual access" to them. It's linked to partible paternity, which refers to the cultural notion that a kid can have many fathers.


Polyandry is thought to be more common in civilizations with limited natural resources. It is believed to help children survive by limiting human population increase. It is an uncommon type of marriage that may be seen among peasant households and the upper crust. Polyandry, for example, is linked to the land shortage in the Himalayan mountains. When all family brothers marry the same woman, the family land remains intact and undivided. If each brother married and produced children independently, the family land would be divided into unsustainable tiny pieces. In Buddhist Ladakh and Zanskar, on the other hand, very impoverished people without land were less likely to practice polyandry. The social practice for the impartible inheritance was used in Europe to avoid land division. Many of their siblings became celibate monks and priests after being disinherited.
In the animal realm, polyandrous mating systems are also a widespread occurrence.


Types


Polygynandry


Polyandry and polygyny can join the Indian Himalayas to form a system known as "polygynandry." Land fragmentation is reduced, domestic economic activities are diversified, and population increase is reduced due to the system.


Polyandry between brothers is referred to as fraternal polyandry.


Fraternal polyandry, also known as adelphic polyandry (from the Latin fraternity), is a kind of polyandry in which a woman marries two or more brothers. Polyandry was (and still is) practiced in certain regions of Tibet, Nepal, and Northern India, where it was recognized as a societal practice. Fraternal polyandry is practiced among the Toda people of southern India. However, monogamy has lately become popular. Polyandrous marriages in rural cultures in the Malwa area of Punjab appear to occur in modern Hindu society to prevent the partition of farming land.
Fraternal polyandry accomplishes a purpose comparable to primogeniture in nineteenth-century England. The eldest son received the family land due to primogeniture, while younger boys were forced to leave home and seek their job. By allowing just one successor each generation, primogeniture kept family holdings intact for decades. Fraternal polyandry achieves the same result, but keeping all of the brothers together with only one bride, resulting in only one set of heirs every generation. The bigger the fraternal sibling group, the less effective this technique appears to be.


Some types of polyandry appear to be linked to a perceived necessity to keep aristocratic titles or agricultural holdings within family groupings, as well as the frequent departure of a male from the household for lengthy periods. The priestly Sakya elite in Tibet was particularly fond of the practice.Sorority marriage is the female counterpart to fraternal polyandry.


Partible paternity


At least 20 tribal groups, according to anthropologist Stephen Beckerman, recognize that a kid might, and ideally should, have more than one father, a concept known as "partible paternity." It frequently leads to many dads sharing the care of a child in a polyandric relationship with the mother. However, this is not always the case. Trobriand's "virgin birth" is one of the most well-known instances. The matrilineal Trobriand Islanders understand the role of sex in reproduction, but they do not think the male contributes to the kid's constitution. Therefore, the infant stays solely connected to their mother's lineage. Because they are part of the mother's lineage, the non-resident spouses of the mother are not acknowledged as dads. However, the mother's co-resident brothers are.


Culture


According to inscriptions documenting the reforms of Sumerian king Urukagina of Lagash (ca. 2300 BC), the previous Sumerian custom of polyandry was prohibited in his kingdom, under pain of the woman accepting several husbands being stoned and her crime inscribed on her body. 


Polyandry has been justified by a severe gender imbalance, according to some. Selective abortion of female fetuses, for example, has resulted in a substantial sex ratio margin in India, which has been claimed to result in related males "sharing" a woman.


Known cases


Polyandry was prevalent in Tibet and is being practiced to a lesser level now. In a 1988 study of 753 Tibetan households, Tibet University discovered that 13% practiced polyandry. Polyandry persists among India's minorities, as well as in Bhutan and Nepal's northern regions. Polyandry has been practiced among the Toda of South India in Rajasthan, Ladakh, and Zanskar and in the Jaunsar-Bawar area of Uttarakhand.


It has also been reported in Nigeria, the Nymba, and certain pre-contact Polynesian tribes, albeit most likely exclusively among women of upper castes. It is also found in the Yunnan and Sichuan areas of China, among the Mosuo people of China (who also practice polygyny), and in some Sub-Saharan African groups, such as the Maasai people of Kenya and northern Tanzania, as well as indigenous populations in the United States. Polyandry was practiced by the Guanches, the first known inhabitants of the Canary Islands, until their extinction. Polyandry is also practiced by the Zo'e tribe in the Brazil's state of Pará, near the Cuminapanema River.


Religious attitudes


Hinduism


The Mahabharata, an ancient Hindu epic, has at least one allusion to polyandry. Draupadi picked the Pandava brothers in a former life and wedded them. Polyandry is accepted as a way of life in this ancient book, which is mostly indifferent to the notion. When asked for an example of polyandry by Kunti, Yudhishthira mentions Gautam-clan Jatila (married to seven Saptarishis) and Hiranyaksha's sister Pracheti (married to 10 brothers), suggesting a more liberal attitude toward polyandry in Vedic culture.


Judaism


Although there are no examples of women married to more than one man in the Hebrew Bible, its depiction of adultery plainly suggests that polyandry is undesirable and is not practiced in Jewish tradition. Furthermore, unless he had previously divorced her or died (i.e., a mamzer), children from other than the first spouse are regarded illegitimate since they are the result of an adulterous relationship.


Christianity


Most Christian faiths in the Western world strongly promote monogamy, and a verse from Paul's epistles (1 Corinthians 7) can be read as prohibiting polyandry.


Latter-Day Saints


Polygynous marriages were practiced by Joseph Smith, Brigham Young, and other early Mormon leaders. With the 1890 Manifesto, the practice was formally stopped. In early LDS history, polyandrous marriages did exist, but in far smaller numbers.


Islam


Polyandry is forbidden in Islam, despite the fact that Islamic marriage law allows males to have up to four wives.
Polyandrous marriages were common in pre-Islamic Arabian societies, but they were prohibited when Islam spread. Nikah Ijtimah was a pagan polyandry tradition that was denounced and destroyed after the advent of Islam in older Arab countries.


In biology


In the animal realm, polyandrous behavior is fairly common. Many bug and fish species have it (for example, pipefish; see Polyandry in fish). Other creatures that have it include birds (such as dunnocks), whales, and mammals like the house mouse.
The bowhead whale, harbor porpoise (Phocoena phocoena), and humpback whales have all been seen to be polyandrous.


Honeybees, red flour beetles, spiders like Stegodyphus lineatus, crickets like Gryllus bimaculatus, and fruit flies like Drosophila pseudoobscura are among the important insect species.
Some primates, such as marmosets, including the marsupial species Antechinus, are polyandrous.


Polygyny states of having more than one mate or wife at a time is the most prevalent and recognized type of polygamy, involving a man marrying many women. Polygyny is the only type of polygamy legal in the majority of Muslim-dominated nations. Polyandry is when a woman has more than one spouse.


Men are known to have one or more mistresses whom they do not marry in certain nations where polygamy is banned, even in some countries where it is allowed. Mistresses do not have the same legal standing as wives, and children produced from such relationships are still regarded as illegitimate and susceptible to legal consequences.


Incidence


Polygyny is now more common in Africa than everywhere else in the world. The influence of the slave trade on the male-to-female sex ratio, according to some researchers, is a major element in the establishment and strengthening of polygynous behaviors in African countries. In general, the higher the prevalence of polygyny in rural regions with rising populations, the longer young males wait to marry. The higher the average polygyny rate, the more gerontocracy, and social inequality are present.


As many as a third to half of the married women in the African polygyny belt, that stretches from Senegal in the west to Tanzania in the east, are in polygynous partnerships, and polygyny is particularly prevalent in West Africa. Polygyny was once tolerated in ancient Hebrew civilization, classical Chinese society, and sporadic traditional Native American, African, and Polynesian societies. It was reported to be performed in India throughout ancient times. It was widely recognized in ancient Greece until the Roman Empire and the Roman Catholic Church came into being.


Polygyny is practiced by several Mormon groups in North America, including the Fundamentalist Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints (FLDS Church).


Reasons and explanations


Improving the division of work


Boserup 1970 was the first to argue that the high rate of polygyny in Sub-Saharan Africa is due to the sexual division of labor in hoe-farming and women's significant economic contribution.


Labor is often clearly divided between genders in various shifting agricultural zones where polygyny is most commonly reported. In many of these situations, older boys and men are in charge of cutting trees in preparation for new plots, erecting fences to keep wild animals out of fields, and sometimes even the initial planting of crops (along with hunting, fishing, and the raising of livestock). Wives, on the other hand, are in charge of various elements of the family's food production, processing, and distribution, as well as performing domestic tasks for the husband.

With many wives and presumably several young male offspring, an older farmer benefits from having a considerably bigger workforce inside his family. He may progressively extend his agriculture and grow more affluent thanks to the joint efforts of his young sons and young brides. A guy with a single wife receives less assistance in agriculture and is likely to receive little or no assistance in tree felling.


Women living in such a framework, according to Boserup's historical data, also welcome one or more co-wives to share the load of everyday labor with them. The second wife, on the other hand, will generally undertake the most exhausting labor, almost as if she were a servant to the first wife, and will be lower in status than the first wife. A 1930s study of the Mende in Sierra Leone determined that having a high number of wives is an agricultural benefit since having a big number of women eliminates the need for paid employees. In many rural regions, polygyny is seen as a financial benefit.

In certain situations, the second wife's economic function allows the husband to spend more time with his family.


In the majority of Sub-Saharan African civilizations, anthropologist Jack Goody's comparative research of marriage using the Ethnographic Atlas revealed a historical link between widespread shifting horticulture and polygyny. Goody, citing the work of Ester Boserup, observes that women perform the majority of the labor in parts of Africa's sparsely inhabited shifting agriculture zones. This favored polygamous marriages, in which males attempted to take control of the production of women "who are valued both as laborers and child carriers." Goody, on the other hand, points out that the relationship isn't perfect and goes on to describe more traditionally male-dominated but relatively large farming systems, such as those found in much of West Africa, particularly in the savanna region, where polygamy is desired more for the production of male offspring labor and wherein farming is valued.

White and Michael L. Burton analyze and support Goody's observations about African male farming systems, noting that "Goody (1973) speaks against the female contributions theory." He mentions Dorjahn's (1959) comparing of East and West Africa, which shows higher female agricultural contributions in East Africa and higher polygyny rates in West Africa, particularly in the West African savanna, where male agricultural contributions are notably strong. "The motives for polygyny are sexual and reproductive rather than economic and productive," according to Goody (1973 -1989), claiming that men married polygonally to maximize their fertility and establish big families with many young dependent males.


Desire for offspring

The majority of study on the causes of polygyny has been on macro-level issues. Polygyny is widespread among family groupings that share a common ancestor. Polygyny was also used as a "dynamic basis of family survival, development, stability, continuity, and prestige," particularly as a socially acceptable technique for rapidly increasing the number of adult employees and eventually increasing the workforce of resident children.

Scientific investigations have determined that the human mating system is relatively polygynous, based on both global population surveys and reproductive physiology features.


Economic burden

Scholars have suggested that in farming systems where males perform the majority of the labor, having a second wife might be a financial liability rather than an asset. To feed a second wife, the husband must either work harder himself or hire employees to help with some of the jobs. Polygyny is either non-existent or a luxury enjoyed by a small group of wealthy farmers in such areas.


One of the strongest appeals of polygyny to men in Africa is because of its economic aspect, for a man with several wives commands them to get more land, this can produce more food for his household and that can achieve a high status due to the wealth which he can command," according to a report by the UN Economic Commission for Africa (ECA) secretariat. According to Esther Boserup, tribal land tenure norms still apply to most of Africa. [Needs a page] This means that members of a tribe that controls a territory have a natural right to cultivate the land for food production and, in many circumstances, cash crops. An additional woman is an economic advantage in this tenure arrangement, as it allows the family to extend its productivity.


Polygyny-practicing societies, according to economist Michèle Tertilt, are less economically stable than monogamous countries. Polygynous nations have a greater fertility rate, smaller savings reserves, and a lower GDP than monogynous ones. If polygyny were outlawed, fertility would drop by 40%, savings would grow by 70%, and GDP would rise by 170 percent. Because monogamous males may save and spend their resources because they have fewer offspring, monogamous cultures have higher economic output. Males in polygynous cultures put more money into techniques of mating with women, whereas monogamous men put more money into their families and other associated institutions.

Men gain from polygynous marriages, despite the costs, because familial relationships provide economic and social security. These guys have the links they need to compensate for other income shortfalls because of their extensive network of in-laws.


Libido


Some experts believe that a strong libido may play a role in polygyny, while others dismiss the possibility. Although such libidinal perceptions were sometimes discarded in favor of seeing polygyny as a factor of traditional life, sex drive as a factor in some Asian cultures was sometimes associated with wealthy men, and those who were adjuncts to an aristocracy, such libidinal perceptions were sometimes discarded in favor of seeing polygyny as a factor of traditional life. Polygyny, according to some interpretations, is a technique employed to fend off infidelity tendencies.


Findings


According to certain studies, men who live in polygynous relationships live 12 percent longer. Polygyny may be used in situations when there is a reduced male-to-female ratio, such as when male newborns are more likely to die from infectious illnesses.

According to other studies, civilizations that practice polygyny becomes more destabilized, bloodier, more prone to invade neighbors, and more likely to collapse. This has been ascribed to the polygyny inequality factor, in which wealthy men can have several spouses, leaving more impoverished men unmarried. After adjusting for other variables, the research found that African children in polygynous homes were more likely to die young owing to less attentive dads.


Women's effects


"In a study of the Ngwa Igbo Clan in Nigeria, Exposito discovered five primary reasons for men to have many wives:" because the Ngwa husband might have more than one wife be able to have as many children as he wishes inflate his ego and elevate his status among his peers raise his social standing in the community guarantee that enough labor is available to undertake required fieldwork and the processing of commercial oil-palm output and fulfill his sexual desires. None of the reasons mentioned are advantageous to the women; instead, they are all beneficial to the husbands. Feminists in Egypt have pushed to ban polygamy, but because it is considered a basic human right, the struggle has been unsuccessful. Women have more marriage equality and are better able to convey their views on family planning in nations where polygyny is less common.


Women in polygynous marriages face many of the same marital challenges as women in monogamous marriages; nevertheless, some issues are specific to polygyny that impair women's overall life satisfaction and have serious health consequences. Polygyny exposes women to STDs, infertility, and mental health issues. Fear of contracting AIDS or getting infected with HIV has influenced women's decisions to marry polygynous partners among the Logoli of Kenya. Polygyny is seen by some as a way for males to avoid picking random sexual partners and therefore spreading STDs into partnerships. In interviews with members of the Logoli tribe in Kenya, it was revealed that they were afraid of polygynous marriages because of what they had seen in the lives of other women in similar partnerships. Some women in polygynous partnerships have reported feelings of envy, rivalry, tensions, and psychological stress. Envy, hate, and even violent physical conflicts among co-wives and their children become the norm when some spouses fail to share affection and other resources equitably. Women are less likely to engage in polygynous marriages as a result of this. According to research, competitiveness and conflict between co-wives can escalate to an unacceptable degree, prompting women to commit suicide due to psychological suffering. According to the findings, the wife's order has an impact on life satisfaction. According to Bove and Valencia, elder wives frequently abuse their status to get healthcare benefits in nations where only one wife is eligible. Higher incidences of mental health problems such as anxiety, sadness, and paranoia have been linked to conflict amongst co-wives.


The level of jealousy and conflict among wives has been reduced by a variety of techniques. Sororal polygyny, in which the co-wives are sisters, and hut polygyny, in which each woman has her own home, and the husband visits them on a rotating basis, are examples. A defined status hierarchy among wives may also be utilized to prevent fights by clearly defining each wife's rights and responsibilities. Even though there are numerous negative features of this practice that affect women, there are also documented personal and economic benefits for women, such as sharing household and child-rearing tasks. Co-wives also provide support and company to women.


Criticism


Polygynous marriages serve a significant part in preserving gender norms on the African continent. Although African women account for more than half of the continent's population, they are seen as second-class citizens compared to African males. Polygyny contributes to gender inequality by establishing a legal tie through marriage that binds women to a subservient position. Although women across the continent are responsible for a substantial percentage of agricultural output (both sustainable and cash crops), males married to these women receive the advantages and are free to divide their earnings as they see appropriate.


Premodern era


Monogamy and polygyny were practiced in Africa, the Americas, and Southeast Asia throughout the Premodern Era, which lasted from 600 BCE to 1600 BCE. Even in regions where monogamy was common, polygyny existed. During these periods, wealth had a significant influence on the development of family life. The most powerful males had numerous secondary spouses due to their wealth, a practice known as resource polygyny. As a symbol of authority and prestige, local rulers of villages generally had the most wives. Village conquerors would frequently marry the daughters of the previous rulers as a sign of conquest. With the emergence and growth of Islam in Africa and Southeast Asia, resource polygyny persisted. These children were deemed free because they were born into these families. Children born to free or slave concubines were free, although their status was lower than that of children born to spouses. The living arrangements differed per region. Each woman in Africa had her own house, as well as property and animals. The concept of the spouse owning all property developed in Europe and was not accepted in Africa. Wives lived together in isolation in many other regions of the world, under one home. The wives had their harem (also known as a prohibited section) in the house.

‘Sister Wives’ Star Mariah Brown Comes Out As Gay: WATCH


Sister Wives star Mariah Brown (above) came out to her parents on Sunday night’s episode of the TLC reality show.In the clip, Mariah gathers all five of her parents together to tell them that she identifies as a lesbian.


One of 18 children in the polygamist marriage, Mariah tells her parents “I’m gay.”


In a preview for the next episode, her birth parents Kody and Meri are less than pleased about the announcement.


US Weekly reports:


Meri tells Kody, “You were like smiling and happy and saying you were so happy for her. And I’m just … I don’t …” Kody replies, “We’re not happy Mariah’s gay; we’re happy Mariah knows herself.”


However, in an interview last year sister wife Robyn revealed that although Mormon Fundamentalism does not approve of homosexuality the family believes that “all adults should be able to choose who they love and how they structure their family.”


Watch Mariah’s coming out clip and the family’s comments on same-sex marriage below.

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Source : US Weekly


Seeking Sister Wife viewers are used to watching drama between poly families on the show, particularly from Dimitri and Ashley Snowden. Their rocky relationship with potential sister wives - including Christeline Peterson, who accused them both of abuse - and with each other is a big plot point each season. While every cast member struggles in their own way with the polygamous lifestyle, the Snowdens have faced more difficulties than most, with a record of failed marriages, allegations of abuse, and restraining orders.


Ashley Snowden’s Instagram Posts

Not long after allegations came out against the Snowdens, fans began speculating on the status of the remaining two members of the family, Dimitri and Ashley, after Ashley posted a cryptic post on Instagram. The caption for the post was centered around emotional maturity and appeared to be Ashley’s way of separating herself from Dimitri and the stories regarding his previous relationships. “Sometimes emotional maturity is apologizing when you were wrong…and sometimes it’s knowing what isn’t yours to apologize for,” Ashley wrote in the post. “Being emotionally mature is taking heed to red flags, giving yourself grace for past mistakes you’ve learned from, knowing your boundaries and upholding them, knowing when something is good for you and when it’s not, not giving life to every negative thought that pops into your head or being consumed by the past or thoughts of the future, and finally, looking in the mirror and knowing your worth, even if those around you don’t.” She concluded the post by saying, “Emotional maturity isn’t martyrdom. It’s learning thyself, and then applying the knowledge despite what others think they know about you. And, it’s also knowing that letting go may be painful, but perhaps the best thing that can happen for you.” 


The Instagram post, published on June 27, left many fans speculating because it seemed like Ashley was saying she was done with her marriage without actually saying that. This week, those fan theories were validated as Ashley posted again less than three weeks after her original post. In this one, she does say the words “I’m single” in the opening line of the post. She also said she is choosing to share her truth publicly because “misinformation is harmful.” She goes on to share tips that “may make this world a kinder place for everyone, especially people who are experiencing trauma.” Her tips are essentially advising people to reach out to people they’re concerned about in private and “if you can’t approach them privately, 9x out of 10, it’s none of your business.” Sometimes it’s hard to remember we may feel like we know reality stars, but they don’t know us. Even though sharing their lives publicly is what they “signed up” for, that’s really only true to a certain extent. At the end of the day, cameras aren’t rolling right now, and regardless, people do deserve to still be in control of their lives.


Dimitri Wiped His Instagram Clean

Toward the end of Ashley’s post she says, “It’s cool if you don’t like me, that’s life. However, there’s power in redirecting energy to things you do like. Unfollowing is an undervalued tool for a peaceful life. Blocking or restricting accounts are dope features, too.” Her now ex-husband, Dimitri, seems to have taken this advice and has since deleted all the photos from his Instagram. This is not the first time Dimitri has gone quiet on social media - most recently before this, he placed his accounts on private when news broke about the situation with Christeline - but it is the first time he’s actually wiped his account clean. Not just the photos with Ashley, but all of them, including ones with his children. While Dimitri has not specified why he deleted all of his Instagram postings, there are already numerous fan theories circulating. The timing of it indicates that he may be attempting to remove Ashley and their life together from his memories. While Dimitri has had at least five wives and Ashley is not his first, she has been with him the longest, and her decision to leave may be more difficult for him to accept than any of his other marriages.


Our Thoughts

Despite having five sister wives between 2003 and 2019, Dimitri clearly does not appear to be a polygamous relationship expert. Even though you’re able to delete images from social media, you cannot delete the actual memories with the person. This is especially so for Ashley and Dimitri as they have three children, so their lives will never be fully disconnected. Dimitri's 140,000 Instagram followers are ready to learn what happens next for this unconventional former couple, but it’s looking like they’re going to have to wait until the next season of Seeking Sister Wife.


We think that Dimitri’s reaction kind of shows that his method for dealing with these things is to not deal with them. Breakups, especially poly breakups, can be a lot to digest. However, if you don’t truly process them and learn from them, you shouldn’t be surprised if it keeps happening. It’s all too easy to place the blame on the person who’s not there anymore, but even if the majority of the blame does rest on their shoulders, it’s pretty rare for only one person to be completely responsible. Maybe you ignored red flags or swept their seemingly petty grievances under the rug. Whatever it is, really try to understand their perspective and identify how you can avoid those missteps in the future. The goal of this isn’t to beat yourself up or rub salt in a wound, but to adapt and grow into the best polygamous spouse you can be. 


Season 3 of Seeking Sister Wife just recently ended and many fans have already been asking for Season 4. However, as of now, TLC has neither confirmed nor denied if the show has been renewed for another season. Plus, a tell-all for season 3 has not been filmed, and considering the state of the Snowdens, fans can’t help but speculate if they will film the special. Hopefully, the show will figure out a way to move forward with the other families. Be sure to check back here for more updates on all things Seeking Sister Wife, Sister Wives, and polygamy dating/marriage!









Published By: Christopher Alesich 

Matchmakers Inc: Sisterwives.com


Dimitri Snowden, of TLC's Seeking Sister Wife, has filed for divorce from wife Christeline Peterson. Although filing didn’t occur until this month (May 2021), their date of separation is listed as January 21 of this year, citing “irreconcilable differences” as the reason for the divorce.

Dimitri also requested that the court not grant Christeline spousal support, noting that there are no assets or debts to be divided. He also stated in the document that she "has abandoned the marriage" and that he "does not know her whereabouts."


Seeking Sister Wife fans know the Snowdens have spent the last 10 years or so searching for a third wife to add to their family. We’ve seen their journey over the course of 3 seasons now: The season 1 courting which ended with Dimitri getting intimate too soon in the relationship, the season 2 courting and marriage to Vanessa Cobbs (and subsequent break up via text), and the season 3 courting of both Christeline and Tayler Monique.


 After a few months of long-distance dating and a successful first visit, the South African native Christeline and her two children moved to California to be with the Snowdens (and Tayler) shortly before the COVID-19 travel ban. Not long after Tayler’s exit from the show, Christeline and Dimitri were legally wed in July of last year. The storyline is still unfolding on our TVs as season 3 episodes air.


Abuse Allegations

The divorce filing comes after allegations of abuse against both Dimitri and Ashley, for which Christeline attempted to get a restraining order against them both. She claims that Dimitri was physically and verbally abusive, including when the two were sexually intimate. The allegations towards Ashley were that she was aggressive and verbally abusive as well. According to documents Christeline filed to get the restraining order back in January, she claimed Dimitri woke her up by "slamming [her] head into the headboard of the bed and he was yelling at [her]." She said she filed a police report as well and was issued a temporary restraining order. However, she was unable to secure one against Ashley due to a lack of information provided to the court. In April, the temporary restraining order and case were dissolved when Dimitri appeared in court.


Additionally, a woman who was involved with the Snowden’s before Seeking Sister Wife began named Ariadne Joseph has made allegations similar to Christeline’s. After news broke about the allegations against the Snowden’s, we saw Tayler send love to Christeline via Instagram (notably, before it was revealed on the show that Tayler had left the Snowdens) while Vanessa from season 2 shared support for domestic abuse victims. It should be noted that all of the women beside Ariadne - who created a GoFundMe to support Christeline and her two children during this time - apparently signed NDAs. 


Ashley’s Miscarriage

On Mother’s Day, Ashley shared via Instagram that she had suffered a miscarriage. This news broke a few days before Dimitri officially filed for divorce from Christeline. In her post, Ashley wrote:


“To the Mothers, all the mothers, and especially the mothers who have known great loss. To those who wanted to be mothers, but never got the chance due to physical issues or forlorn relating. To the mothers who miscarried or experienced stillbirth. To the mothers who have experienced the death of their once living children. To the mothers who were “done mothering” only to be tasked with mothering another’s children. To the mothers who’s children were taken in custody battles. To the mothers of kidnapped children. To the mothers of children they gave up in adoption. To the mothers who may have incarcerated children. To the mother’s incarcerated. To the mothers who have children who don’t want to have a relationship with them. To the mothers who can’t bring themselves to face their children. To all the mothers and and their children lost during the pandemic. TO ALL THE MOTHERS.

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Motherhood is a beautiful initiation. But it can be one of the most painful to endure. This Mother’s Day, I honor every aspect of motherhood. I’ve known great loss in my life, but losing a child under any circumstance certainly impacts the subtle body on multiple levels. I’ve recently had to sit in the pain of miscarriage, so I offer this message today: Be kind always, and especially, because you never know a mother’s story. Be slow to judge and quick to love, because many mothers are carrying not only their own pain, but the pain of every mother down their lineage. Until we can heal that pain, until that pain can be transmuted, reflect back love to every potential mother’s path you may cross. Reflect love.

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Happy Mother’s Day to ALL THE MOTHERS.”


There’s not much else reported on her miscarriage at this time, but we send love and healing to her and anyone else who has experienced this loss.


Our Thoughts

We are deeply troubled and saddened regarding the abuse allegations against the Snowdens. While we may not know for sure what happened, and may never know, it’s always important to us to discuss and denounce allegations of abuse in the Polygamist community. We hope to gain more insight one way or the other from the Snowdens or from Seeking Sister Wife. We know that a petition to have the Snowden’s removed from the show was created, but it only has 100 signatures as of May 23.


We know how much watching the real journeys of poly families who are searching for a Sister Wife helps people like us and our members as we are on a similar path, but it’s important to remember these are real people. When situations like this arise, it can be tempting to speculate on what really happened, but we have to remember how serious of a situation it is and the real lives impacted by it. Additionally, we should also remember to never idolize people just because we enjoy watching them on TV. This also serves as a reminder of how crucial it is to take the time to choose the right poly partners for you. There’s never any reason to rush into anything, and you want to be sure everyone involved has enough time to healthily adjust to the process of finding and adding a Sister Wife to your family. You also want to be sure you really know who is joining your family, and they should be sure they really know you. 


Seeking Sister Wives airs Mondays at 9 p.m. ET on TLC.


At Sister Wives, our poly matchmaking service is committed to finding love for each and every one of our members. Be sure to check out our services and resources that serve as a guide to help you discover the best polygamy dating app for you.









Published By: Christopher Alesich 

Matchmakers Inc: Sisterwives.com


'Sister Wives' Star Christine Is Selling Her Las Vegas Mansion — Take a Tour!



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It's official, y'all! Everyone's favorite Sister Wives are headed to Arizona with their shared hubby, Kody Brown. However, before the dynamic fivesome can hit the open road, Christine has to sell her spectacular Las Vegas mansion. Check out the video above for a full tour of the reality star's Sin City home. 


According to Radar Online, Christine put her impressive abode on the market back in July for a whopping $675K. Seeing as she initially purchased the home in 2012 for $443,315 — that's a pretty substantial markup! Turns out, wives can be savvy with real estate, too. 


With five bedrooms and four bathrooms, it's safe to say that whoever purchases the home next will have to boast a family just as big as the Browns. Who knows? Maybe the Duggarsare in the market for a vacation home. All jokes aside, the Browns aren't just moving because they seemingly need more space... you know, because they have 18 children, but they're also looking for a much-needed change in lifestyle.


"As much as we've loved making our home and memories here in Las Vegas, we are excited to embark on a new adventure in Flagstaff, Arizona! We are looking forward to cooler temperatures, the mountain air, scenic views, and the slower lifestyle of Flagstaff," The Sister Wives stars spilled to People on July 10.

And don't worry, folks, it sounds like all of the wives will be making this move. Despite all of the drama following Meri Brown's catfishing scandal, she made it clear that she's still with Kody when a fan asked if they were getting divorced on Instagram. "Uhhhh, did you see the post just three photos back? That's Kody lol! Don't listen to tabloid lies! Haha!" wrote Meri. Janelle also recently promised fans that she's still devoted to her family, and not planning to leave the show or her husband. 

Well, here's hoping all of Kody's ladies love Arizona! After all, it's hard enough to please one wife with a new home, let alone four. 

Source: inTouch

Avoidance is a very natural part of being human. It stems from fear — whether it’s fear of the outcome of an event, fear of the difficult feelings that accompany an event, or just general fear of the actual event itself. Whether that’s fear of being your true self or fear of sitting down with a loved one and telling them how their actions are hurting you, avoidance is a common escape route.


Avoidance can chip away even at the strongest of bonds between sister wives and husbands. Poor communication skills, unresolved personal issues, and insecurity can manifest as avoidance and extreme fear.


Avoidance can work as a de-escalation tool in the short term. For instance, avoiding a big verbal fight can save you from saying things you don’t really mean in the heat of the moment. Avoiding a physical fight means you’re thinking sensibly and preventing yourself from getting hurt, potentially in a fatal way.


But avoidance as a coping mechanism? It can lead to relationships crumbling to the ground, in a span of a few weeks or over decades. Let’s look at some key examples from Sister Wives and Seeking Sister Wife to fully analyze this very human trait.


Feeling Neglected: A Sister Wife’s Catfishing Scandal

Years ago, Meri of Sister Wives was caught in a scandal after getting catfished by a woman posing as a man online. Her reasoning for chatting up strangers online? She felt neglected by long-time husband Kody Brown and needed affection he could not provide.


The issue:

Kody and Meri Brown had been facing marital issues for some time. Kody even went as far as to say he no longer felt romantic affection for his first wife. As a result, Meri looked for it elsewhere.


Bottom line is, Meri did not want to confront Kody about their deteriorating marriage. Yes, they had been attending therapy and needed to put in extra work to maintain their relationship, but at the end of the day, Meri made a choice. And this sister wife chose to avoid expressing her feelings and keep working on her relationship with her husband Kody.


The aftermath:

To this day, Kody feels somewhat betrayed by Meri seeking connection from internet strangers. This isn’t to say Kody doesn’t share the blame for their declining marriage, but now both must work to repair the damage. Presumably, Meri feels the weight of her decision — as we all do when we make decisions based on fear and insecurity. 


But what’s done is done, and by avoiding the hard work of repairing a marriage and laying their feelings out on the table, Kody and Meri’s relationship is still recuperating.


Jealousy: Paige McGee of Seeking Sister Wife

Another emotion humans tend to gloss over is jealousy. Even before the late Bernie McGee began testing the waters for finding a sister wife, wife Paige McGee was already anticipating jealousy. When he dove into the sister wife dating pool, Paige experienced these feelings a thousandfold.


The issue:

I’m no psychologist, but I believe that root of jealousy in sister wife relationships is partly the immense worry that your partner will like their new love interest so much that they’ll leave you behind to start a new life. And this is a valid fear. What if all those years you’ve dedicated to building a life with this person is suddenly gone because they’re electric with new relationship energy?


That’s likely what Paige felt, alongside the primal feeling of seeing her husband express interest in and spend time with other women. According to sources, her jealousy did not even stem from hearing family members speak about her husband’s interactions with other women: it was just pure jealousy. 


In this case, Paige avoided dealing with her intense feelings. She did not ask herself how she could manage jealousy, giving herself the grace needed to confront such strong feelings. Instead, she was consumed by them and in the end, she and her husband could not pursue a relationship with a new sister wife.


The aftermath:

Again, Paige and Bernie could not bring in a sister wife to their life because of Paige’s jealousy. It’s completely normal, and it’s one of the main reasons why exploring polyamory and polygamy can feel daunting. What do you do when you enjoy a sister wife’s companionship and love, but still feel resentful when they spend the night with your shared husband?


Don’t let things fester

Just from the two instances above, we can see that not talking things out — avoiding potentially difficult conversations — can lead to some pretty bad consequences. They can lead you to miss out on life-changing opportunities or creating irreparable damage.


What’s more, avoiding these feelings usually indicate that we need have a talk with ourselves. When we accept that some feelings just can’t be avoided in a polygamous relationship, we’re more like to face them with the assurance that we’ll come out on the other side as a better person.


We’re more likely to look jealousy, resentment, and insecurity in the face and say: I see you, I acknowledge you, and I have the power to move on from you. Of course, this is easier said than done. When we are in the middle of a rough patch (either for personal, interpersonal, or professional reasons), it can be easy to get lost in the tunnel and never see anything beyond another dreadful day.


But listen. Avoiding your feelings only makes you feel worse. It feeds negative energy that can make even the simplest issues feel Herculean. So I challenge you today to be brave and confront life and your relationships with newfound confidence. Because relationships are never easy, but healthy relationships are so worth the fight.









Published By: Christopher Alesich 

Matchmakers Inc: Sisterwives.com


In a conventional, monogamous marriage, divorce and death are somewhat straightforward. Often, the property both spouses acquired during the marriage is split evenly. Everything else each spouse already had before the marriage or other assets they inherited is not shared. This practice, known as community property law, is present in just nine states across the US.


So when a couple files for divorce, sorting out property and assets is generally an uncontested process, especially if they have a prior agreement like a prenuptial. But what happens in polygamous relationships where there may be three, four, or five people involved? What happens to a sister wife if their husband dies and she was not legally married to him?


Bigamy, the act of marrying someone while you’re already married, is illegal in every state. Consequently, polygamists marry just one wife (on paper, anyway) and then “spiritually marry” sister wives who later join their home. When a primary spouse passes away – aka someone who was the original legal marriage agreement — the process gets tricky.


Legally, most assets and properties belong to the person they were married to, and not the sister wives who came later on. In many cases, a husband might marry and remarry sister wives just to obtain certain legal rights for the wife and family. For instance, Kody Brown of TLC’s Sister Wives divorced his first wife Meri and married his fourth wife Robyn so he could legally adopt Robyn’s children.


Certain benefits are born from legal marriage, too. Insurance benefits, tax deductions, and even work leave benefits come to mind. Polygamists are deprived of these basic rights because the system does not recognize the validity of their relationship. It does not fit the man-marries-woman framework that property laws cater to.


But to answer the original question, only a sister wife who was legally married to her husband has a right to any property or asset. Everything else must be settled personally or through lengthy court processes which differ by state.


Do modern sister wives live together?

There’s no one-size-fits-all for living arrangements, especially in polygamous relationships. There are, however, trends we can observe. Here are some common living habits a sister wife might experience.


Everyone lives under the same roof.

Often, a large house with sizable outdoor areas is preferred. With the stigma surrounding the polygamist lifestyle, many families might seek out more suburban or rural areas.


For city dwellers, younger partners, or people with no kids, living in an apartment or small house may be the best solution.


Each wife and/or family lives separately.

This might be true for extra-large families that simply need their own space. Clashing schedules, strong personalities, and different work locations all come into play. Families may meet as often as once a day or a few times a week, and special holidays are a big deal.


Each sister wife visits their primary partner in turns.

In cases where there is a “home base” plus separate homes, families may take turns spending time together. This could be a weekly arrangement to ensure every sister wife (and children, if applicable), receives the same amount of quality time with the main spouse.


A sister wife lives on her own but visits often.

Not every polyamorist wants to live together or spend every waking moment together with his or her partners. You and your partner might work out an arrangement where a sister wife stays over every weekend. After all, you are all adults with separate lives.


Everyone lives in a commune.

This is far less common than other types of modern arrangements, but it does exist. In some pockets across the US, commune living is possible. Several families live in a village-type community where the rules aren’t so rigid. 


The exact relationships between adults may be undefined and are up to the consenting individuals to determine — if they wish to do so. A benefit in commune living is receiving more help with childcare, utilizing a better support system, and experiencing less pressure stemming from social discrimination.


The future of property laws in plural marriages

As you can see, dividing properties in plural marriages may not be so simple. Already, you have the issue of partners not being legally married but are still just as committed as a couple holding a marriage certificate.


As Diane J. Klein states in the article “Plural Marriage and Community Property Law,” there must be “...the introduction of new marital property concepts” if polygamists are to receive the same benefits as everyone else. This will help streamline property division processes in the event of death or divorce.


A recent survey found that one out of five adults in the US thinks polygamy is “morally acceptable” so social opinion is already shifting. However, legal overhauls may still need decades of work to fully serve sister wife and polygamous arrangements. What do you think is the next best step for lawmakers?









Published By: Christopher Alesich 

Matchmakers Inc: Sisterwives.com


When humans transitioned from nomadic hunter-gatherers to stationary agriculturalists, populations grew, and STIs spread more easily. There’s interesting research that postulates humans shifted to monogamy due to higher sexually transmitted infection (STI) rates under the previous polygamous society.


Why? In ancient communities where STI checks, medication, and sex education weren’t invented yet, this change makes sense. However, other factors could have triggered the change from polygamy to non-monogamy. 


Nevertheless, most people today associate consensually non-monogamous relationships with higher risks or instances of STIs. With potentially more sexual partners, this seems like a harmless, logical assumption. When you think about it, though, it’s detrimental to polygamy’s reputation. So how true is this assumption?


Comparing STI rates in monogamous vs. polygamous relationships


Perform a Google search and you’ll find that research on STI or STD risk in polygamous relationships isn’t too extensive. Some articles focus on animals’ non-monogamous mating patterns. Others focus on very specific communities outside of the United States. I did discover some credible information, though.


One study by The Journal of Sexual Medicine found that people in consensually non-monogamous relationships have more sexual partners (naturally), but they also take more precautions against STIs. They practice safer sexual habits overall compared to people in monogamous partnerships. These safe habits include getting tested regularly and using condoms with all of their sexual partners.


My takeaway: People in polygamous relationships might be more likely to be exposed to STIs because of a higher number of sexual partners, but these same people are more responsible, too. I take this to mean that STI rates are more or less the same between both types of relationships - at least according to current research.


In other words, polygamy dating might technically put you at a higher risk for an STI just because of the number of partners in the mix, but polygamous couples and polyamorous partners are more careful about sex than monogamous couples. Frankly, researchers haven’t conducted enough studies to make a definitive statement. For now, it all comes down to personal responsibility.


What do I do if I contract an STI?

Poly dating is synonymous with openness and honesty. We’re willing to talk positively about sexual health, history, and status. If you test positive for an STI, disclose your test results to all recent sexual partners. It may have been a one-nightstand or a group affair - make sure to tell them so they can get tested.


Common STIs

STIs are common and are harmless if treated on time. Here are the most common ones in the US.


Chlamydia

Trichomoniasis

Human papillomavirus (HPV)

Human Immunodeficiency Virus (HIV)


Common sexually transmitted diseases (STDs)


When left untreated, bacterial or viral infections can evolve into diseases. These diseases are more harmful, and some are untreatable. Note that many online publications use STI and STD interchangeably, but the main difference is that some diseases originate from an infection.


Genital herpes

Syphilis

Gonorrhea


What do I do if my sexual partner contracts an STI?

First, don’t panic. Sometimes even if your partner has an STI/STD and you engaged in sexual activities before they found out, you might not get it. Either way, getting tested is the responsible thing to do. If you’ve been intimate with a different person, make sure to let them know, too.


How often should I get tested?

The minimum is once a year. If you have multiple sexual partners (as is the common case in poly dating), it’s every three to six months. Whenever you connect with an individual, couple, or group on Sister Wives and want to get intimate, everyone should take an STD screening before taking that step.


What can I do to lower my risk of an STI/STD?

There are several steps you can take to protect you and your partner(s) against STDs.


Get tested regularly.

Like we mentioned above, the minimum is once a year but every three to six months if you have multiple partners.


Always use protection when necessary.

Note that condoms do prevent some STDs, but infections like genital and oral herpes can spread through other means. Also, consider dental dams for oral sex.


Be honest about your relationships.

Consensual non-monogamy requires openness and effective communication above all. If you have multiple relationships, keep them updated about any STI scares or positive tests. They (and you) have a right to decide for themselves what sexual risks they’re willing to take.


Get the HPV and hepatitis B vaccine.

The HPV vaccine is administered to children when they’re 11-12 years old. Anyone can get the vaccine before they turn 26. If you’re over 26, you might want to consult with your doctor - this vaccine helps prevent genital warts and certain cancers.


The hepatitis B vaccine is usually administered to infants. Older children and adults can get vaccinated, too, depending on your sexual activity and other risk factors. This vaccine helps prevent hepatitis B, which can be transmitted both through sexual and nonsexual means.


Use separate towels and other personal items.

Certain infections like herpes, hepatitis B, and HIV can spread through nonsexual ways. For instance, sharing needles, participating in skin-to-skin contact, sharing utensils, and platonic kissing can put you at risk of catching an STI.


Take care around recreational drugs/alcohol.

Certain drugs and large amounts of alcohol are known for releasing inhibitions. Unfortunately, in an altered mental state, we’re more likely to engage in risky behavior like unprotected sex or sexual intercourse with partners who haven’t been tested.


My advice? Always surround yourself with people you trust, and when in doubt, take yourself out of the situation while you’re still sober.


Seek proper treatment and complete it.

Most STIs are treatable with simple regimens like taking a pill once a day or applying a topical cream every few hours. However, these treatments are usually only 100% effective if you follow the doctor’s orders to a T. 


So if you’re currently weathering an STI storm, hang in there! In the meantime, read more about sexual health in polyamorous relationships for other issues beyond STIs.








Published By: Christopher Alesich 

Matchmakers Inc: Sisterwives.com


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