Chris's article

So the decision has been made and becoming a sister wife is the way you’ve decided you’ll find love and fulfillment. It is a whole new world to you and a completely different way of dating. It can seem too difficult at times and giving up will be on your mind occasionally. Getting over the hurdles you’ll face is not impossible and dealing with a society that frowns upon your desires is nothing new. Hang in there and consider a few of these realities to be prepared. 


First off, if you are living the way that makes you truly happy and are harming nobody, including yourself, you have to develop a thick skin against the judgments of the world around you. All of the ‘poison’ people try to give you stems from their own shortcomings and desperate lack of joy. You are the happy one and can only hope you’ll affect toxic people in a positive way. It is not your responsibility to explain yourself or to appease them. Let it go and stay focused on your joy. 


Don’t be fooled into thinking dating will be easier in the polyamorous or polygamous world. There are many differing ideas about what a polygamous relationship means and finding sister wives that share your ideals can be tricky. It’s important to be completely straightforward and honest when seeking a poly relationship. 


Some polygamist families are very traditional with one male leading his sister wives as the head of the family. Sexual contact will be only with the husband, or the male head of the family, and there will be no group sexual activity. Women in a very traditional polygamy situation can expect to fulfill traditional ‘wife duties’ with the purpose of raising children and supporting your husband and family. A strong religious affiliation is often involved as well. The traditional polygamist family is also one of the most heavily scrutinized and often results in the need to move into communities that share your values. 


Polyamorous relationships have become more popular recently and while you can be a sister wife and have one male in the relationship it no longer means the family must follow traditional or religious marriage ideals. Modern poly families can involve lesbian, straight, or bisexual females. The guy could be gay, straight, or bisexual as well but the focus here is on becoming a sister wife. The modern take on polygamy is wide open for interpretation by individual families and requires everyone involved to be well in touch with their sexuality and relationship goals. 


Once you’ve done some soul searching to figure out what you’re looking for you’ll be ready to put yourself out there and connect with the right people. You’ll face the same struggles as traditional dating and the prospect of losing more than one lover in a breakup means heartache along the way can be worse until you find ‘the ones’. A new sister wife entering an existing relationship can be very difficult so you’ve got to be mentally prepared for the struggle. Starting a new plural relationship is also not easy. Being confident and honest is vital to success on your journey. Meeting a family seeking a sister wife with completely different views on sex and lifestyle will be a waste of time and energy for everyone involved. Be clear up front with your expectations. 


A supportive community is helpful to ensure you’re meeting the right people and are able to discuss your experiences and expectations freely. There are online communities for poly or polygamy dating and discussion. Take advantage of them. Becoming a sister wife should be an empowering experience and sharing the experience with new sister wives is a beautiful thing. Don’t be afraid to speak candidly and bring up difficult topics. The more you expose your true self the more likely you are to find the right matches. Love yourself first and your possibilities are endless.











Published By: Christopher Alesich

Matchmakers, Inc - Sisterwives.com

All This Love but Why Do I Still Feel Low,


The holidays bring loads of joy to many people. The excitement of holiday parties and spending time with loved ones you may rarely get to see puts a smile in many hearts. However, there is a darker side to the holidays. Financial problems, family problems, relationship troubles, pressure to find the perfect gift, and the list is endless. Being in a poly relationship brings great joy to your life but can also expose you to the risk of negative situations that could turn your holiday joy into a seasonal depression.


Family members sometimes struggle accepting polygamous or polyamorous relatives and they may not realize the severe effect they have on them. Being a sister wife or being involved with multiple partners will always be outside of social norms for many people and depression from feeling like an outcast by those people is an inevitable struggle. Finding family and friends that support you as well as finding others with your poly life in common is key to overcoming the shadow some others would like to cast over you. Find groups online to form a community and turn to your partner and or partners when times feel tough. Don’t avoid these conversations in an effort to keep everyone happy. It doesn’t work in the long run.


Depression over finances is a major and growing issue for the majority of Americans. The suicide rate has been increasing dramatically and shows no sign of slowing down. Much of this is due to financial burdens, lack of resources, and low wages. The holidays can magnify financial woes and send a person over the tipping point. poly families often enjoy the benefit of multiple incomes in one household but this is too often not true or leaves one feeling they need to keep up or do more. Keeping an open dialogue about money is absolutely vital in maintaining a healthy relationship and in ensuring one of your partners is not struggling with an unknown depression over money. If money is tight there are plenty of ways to enjoy the holidays without breaking the bank.


Skip gifts altogether or choose just one great gift the whole house can enjoy. Plan an amazing holiday celebration at home instead of traveling. Draw names so each person in the household needs only to buy one gift for one other partner. If you have kids you can have everyone only buy gifts for the kids. There are few greater joys than watching the excitement when children open gifts. Spend the holidays with your poly family helping others by volunteering to feed the homeless. Helping people in need is an eye opening experience that will help you focus on the positive things in your life.


Depression can be tough to overcome. It can derive from SAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder), a chemical imbalance, chronic pain, unresolved relationship issues, a loss, or many things. If you are experiencing depression that just won’t subside do not be afraid to reach out for help. If you cannot talk to your partners, friends, or family about it there are resources that allow you to remain anonymous. Phone numbers and resources can be found in this link. No matter how tough it seems, you are loved, and you can find happiness again.


Sister Wives is not just a Poly Dating Site, they are also a poly support network. Is your Poly Family depending on your situation? You are all together for a reason. Don’t forget the love you all share. Sometimes you have to force yourself to be positive and put on a happy face to push through tough times. A healthy plural relationship will see to it that each member of the poly family is lifting each other up when needed. Be mindful of those around you this holiday season to ensure you are encouraging peace and joy.










Published By: Christopher Alesich

Matchmakers, Inc - Sisterwives.com


Morality and Polyamory


Polyamorous lifestyles are all the buzz in recent years and their prevalence is reshaping the way society views intimate relationships. The freedom to enjoy multiple partners is a promising shift that can lead to living happier and more fulfilling lives. There is some suspicion that nothing is really changing at all. Society is just being more honest and accepting with each other. However, there remain a large number of people that are concerned about the implications of what they see as a society lacking real commitments. There is a moral dilemma to consider here.

 
Morality is defined as the ‘principles concerning the distinction between right and wrong or good and bad behavior.’ For centuries, marriage between two people has represented the unification and basis society needed to maintain a healthy and productive life. A 50 year wedding anniversary still symbolizes a beautiful life lived morally. These things are ultimately good for society so saying a monogamous marriage is a morally sound existence is not inaccurate, but there is another side to this story. 


Historically, monogamous marriage has often been forced onto people, used to control people, used to entrap, take advantage, extort, and the list goes on. Marriage is not always the pretty picture we like to imagine when you peel a bit of the paint from the surface. For many, monogamy will always be the best choice but it is not necessarily a moral choice. Simply a personal preference. There are other options that allow one to lead an honest, moral, and productive life that benefits society.


It is not immoral to choose a lifestyle that will allow you to be happy and content. Trying to live in monogamy when it’s not best for you will lead to temptations and possibly actions that will bury you in fear and regret and may lead to hurting people you love. Living with secrets and dishonesty is bad for society and for your mental health. Sharing your passion and intimacy with as many as you like while ensuring everyone involved is aware of the situation and under no duress to continue is a morally sound decision. 


The moral dilemma being attached to the rise of polyamory turns out to be quite false. It seems some people that disagree with polyamory can’t agree to disagree and prefer to demoralize people. That, my friend, is immoral behavior. Polyamory and monogamy could both tread into immoral territory if someone is not living honestly. Individuals living the life they truly enjoy will make better decisions and have more positive impacts on the world around them. In a nutshell, living morally is only based on individual behavior within whatever relationships are chosen.











Published By: Christopher Alesich

Matchmakers, Inc - sisterwives.com

POLY RELATIONSHIP VACATION IDEAS


Traditional hotel bars and cruise ships can be great places for couples to meet couples or a person to date but once you have a polyamorous relationship those places can be difficult to enjoy as a throuple or more. People not involved in the poly lifestyle can get confused and you’ll have to constantly explain your relationship to folks that may not think so kindly about you. The world is your oyster, of course, but sometimes you want to simply relax and enjoy the loves of your life. Here are a few ideas to escape the daily grind and the iffy situations traditional things can bring about. 


A cabin in the woods is the perfect getaway. You can cuddle up with as many lovers every night as you please knowing that every morning will start another day of total immersion with them. No hotel workers looking at you oddly as you walk by them or strange attitude from any ladies at the hotel bar last night. A cabin can be your safe place and you can plan outside adventures such as hikes, rafting, or bird watching with little or no involvement with the outside world (other than nature, of course).  


Rent a boat! Organize your own self-guided cruise rather than risk being stuck for days with people you may not want to be around. Pack all of the food and supplies you need for the number of days you will be at sea and plan fun ports of call along the way. Hire a friendly captain or if you’re so inclined train to lead the boat yourself. Fun and sun for days with your loves and with no interference will provide the perfect escape. 


Find a great Airbnb in a major busy city. This one sounds self defeating but if you treat all the people running around like background characters you can rest assured they will not be offended. The Airbnb is your home base for the vacation and you plan outings to see shows or go to events. If the views from your place are great you may not even want to go anywhere else. 


There are endless possibilities for wonderful vacations especially when the highlight is spending time with the ones you love. If you’re in an open poly relationship you may enjoy resorts or organizations that cater to the poly lifestyle. Do research and know your audience before any of them. Most of all simply enjoy your relationships. Many people never seem to find the one they love and you’ve found the many. It’s a beautiful world to explore.




Published By: Christopher Alesich

Matchmakers, Inc - sisterwives.com

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